Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The first table display changes in the population of New york city from 1800 to 2000. The remaining two tables one shows Manhattan, and the other table with different districts demonstrates the population in terms of percentage during the same period.

Overall, in the first table New York City has shown significant population and increased gramatically throughout the years. Five districts in which Manhattan is the second-highest populated district. Brooklyn, Bronx Queens,Staten Island less in population it experienced massive changes over a period respectively.

To begin with, New York City population in the year 1800 is only 79,216 then it is significantly increased 3,437,202, in 1900 further arises upto 8,009,185. In the same years, 5 districts in new york has gained population. In Manhattan it begins with 60,515 in 1800 continue to grow and in 2000 almost 1,538,096.

Following this, other districts also experienced massive population over the same period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the broad rise in New York City’s population and mention Manhattan and the other districts, but the response reports the tables only partially. The overview’s claim that Manhattan was the “second-highest populated district” is not supported by these tables, which group the other four districts together. You also say the city’s population “further arises” to 8,009,185 in 1900, whereas that figure is for 2000; the 1900 total is 3,437,202. The other districts’ figures and changing shares (24%, 46%, then 81%) are not explained, and the final paragraph gives no supporting data. The response is 140 words, below the 150-word minimum. Include an accurate overview and compare the key figures and proportions across all three years.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with” and “Following this” signal movement through the information, and the reader can identify the general topic. However, progression is limited because the final paragraph merely says the other districts experienced population growth without giving figures or completing the comparison. Some links are unclear, particularly “In the same years,” which does not specify which years or how the point relates to the preceding data. The overview also combines several ideas in a confusing way. Organise the body by comparing the city total and district figures, and use clear references to the years and groups so each paragraph develops a complete point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “population,” “districts,” “percentage,” and “massive changes,” so the subject is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for describing numerical trends. “Increased gramatically” does not convey a clear trend, while “further arises” and “massive population” are awkward collocations. Repetition of “population” and “experienced” also makes the description less precise. Spelling and presentation slips, such as “new york” and “upto,” further reduce control. Aim for a small set of accurate reporting expressions—such as “rose,” “accounted for,” and “the remaining districts”—and use them to describe the figures and proportions precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and some basic clauses communicate the main subject and figures. However, control is inconsistent, especially in verb forms, articles, agreement, and sentence construction. For example, “The first table display changes” needs subject–verb agreement, and “it is significantly increased” uses an incorrect verb pattern. The sentence beginning “Overall” contains a fragment-like sequence of claims, while “In Manhattan it begins with 60,515 … continue to grow” shifts subject and verb form. Commas are also missing in places, such as in the list of districts. Build accurate simple sentences first, then add controlled comparisons using forms such as “The population rose from … to …” and “By 2000, … accounted for ….”

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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