Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Yes , there is huge different in it because as time r pass population increases . The New York city population can increases from 79,2146 to 8009,185 between years from 1800 to 2000 m 2 centreny different . In second table Manhattan districts population increase 60,515 in 18000 means 76% . In 19000 population is 1,850,093 means percentage is 54% . in 2000 population 1,538,096 means 19%. In other districts like Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens , Staten island population increase 24% in 18000 or 46% in 1,587,109 or in 81% in 2000. As we compare the they table population is highly increase by time . the high increase in 2000 in other districts table is 81% which is high than then the other .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the broad rise in New York City’s population and report several relevant figures for Manhattan and the other districts. However, the response gives only a limited account of the main features: it does not clearly explain that Manhattan’s population rose to a peak in 1900 and then fell by 2000, while the other districts grew substantially and became the majority. There is also a significant numerical error: the city total in 1800 was 79,216, not “79,2146”; the 2000 total is written with the digits reversed in “8009,185.” The response is also 27 words below the required minimum, leaving the comparisons and overview underdeveloped. Add a clear overview and accurately compare the three years.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response follows a basic time-based sequence, moving from the city total to Manhattan and then the other districts, and phrases such as “In 19000” and “In 2000” help signal changes in time. However, the ideas are presented as one continuous block, with no clear paragraphing or distinct overview. Connections between figures are often unclear: “46% in 1,587,109” does not show which number is the population and which is the share. The final comparison repeats that 81% is high without explaining its relationship to the earlier figures. Organise the answer into an introduction, an overview, and a paragraph of key comparisons; use linking language to make each comparison explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “population,” “percentage,” “districts,” and “increase,” so the reader can recognise the subject of the tables. However, the range is basic and repetitive, and several choices are inaccurate or unnatural. “There is huge different” does not express the comparison correctly, while “the high increase in 2000” confuses a population share with an increase. “Other districts table” is also an imprecise way to refer to the people living in those districts. Spelling and word-form problems, including “centreny,” further reduce clarity. Build a small set of accurate reporting phrases, such as “accounted for,” “rose to,” “declined to,” and “the remaining districts,” and use them precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts simple statements and some longer comparisons, but grammatical control is weak and errors occur throughout. For example, “population can increases” uses an incorrect verb form, and “as time r pass” does not form a correct clause. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also unreliable, as shown by the opening fragment-like statement and the long sequence of figures joined without clear sentence structure. Articles and prepositions are often missing or misplaced, making relationships between the data harder to follow. Practise accurate simple past-tense reporting sentences first, such as “The population rose from X to Y,” then combine them with controlled clauses using “while” or “whereas.”

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