Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

It present the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000, second and third shows the population of the five districts of the city over the same period.

Overall, New york City is the higest population city which is present in table other four district is in the low path.

In New York the most demanded place is Manhattan which is quite famous place and also the most population district at 1800 year 76% of people, 1900 to 2000 years 54% and 19% of people are there. In other district like Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens,Staten Island etc at 24% of human in 1800, then it increase from 24% to 81% at 2000 year 46 % of people perentage at 19000 all total of five district in year 1800, 1900 and 2000 the most population is in 2000 year is the total population 8,009,185

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the topic and include some relevant figures, such as Manhattan’s shares of 76%, 54% and 19%, and the other districts’ rise to 81%. However, the response does not clearly summarise the main changes: the city’s total population rose from 79,216 to 8,009,185, while Manhattan’s population increased to 1,850,093 by 1900 and then fell to 1,538,096. The overview that New York is the “higest population city” is not a meaningful comparison supported by these tables. Some details are confusing or inaccurate, including the reference to “19000” and the unclear statement about the 46% figure. The response is also 26 words below the 150-word minimum. Add a clear overview and accurately compare the key figures and trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response follows a basic order, moving from an introduction to an overview and then to district details, and it uses time markers such as “1800” and “1900 to 2000.” However, the ideas are not arranged clearly enough to form a coherent summary. The second paragraph’s claim about the “higest population city” does not lead into the data, while the final paragraph combines several comparisons in one long, difficult-to-follow sequence. Phrases such as “then it increase from 24% to 81%” and “46% of people perentage at 19000” leave the relationships between figures unclear. Use separate paragraphs for the overview and key comparisons, and organise each comparison chronologically with clear linking phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “total population,” “district,” and “percentage,” so the reader can recognise the subject. However, the range is basic and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear. “Most demanded place” does not describe population, and “low path” is not an appropriate way to describe a smaller share. “Human” is also unsuitable in “24% of human”; use “residents” or “the population.” There are spelling errors such as “higest” and “perentage,” and “New york” should be written as “New York.” Aim for precise terms such as “population share,” “accounted for,” and “declined,” and avoid unsupported descriptions such as “quite famous.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts a few longer sentences and uses basic time expressions, but grammatical control is weak and sentence structures are limited. The opening, “It present the total population,” lacks correct subject–verb agreement and an article; a clearer form is “The table presents the total population.” In “then it increase,” the verb form is incorrect, and the sentence beginning “In other district like…” has no clear grammatical structure. Articles, plurals and punctuation are also inconsistent, as in “other district” and the crowded list of district names. These errors often make relationships between the figures difficult to follow. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them using clauses such as “while” and “whereas.”

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