Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The picture below provides three tables with 6 impressive districts showing the huge number of population between 1800 to 2000.

The first table summarises New York's population where we can see a rise of his number up to 8,009,185 in year 2000.

Also, the other pictures below, explain the population by percentage, making the numbers more effectively.

Manhattan is the second district after New York with a rise of population from 1800 to 1900 but we can see an important decrease of it in year 2000, up to 1,538,096 and 19% of the total.

Brooklin, Bronx, Queens and Stated Island are small districts with the same number and total of population. They started in 1800 with a number of 18,701 people and rise in 1800, making an equal number like in Manhattan. In year 2000 the t

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies the broad rise in New York City’s population and the contrasting decline in Manhattan’s share, which are relevant features. However, several key details are missing or inaccurate: the city’s total population in 1800 and 1900 is not reported, and the other districts’ population rose from 18,701 to 1,587,109 in 1900, not “in 1800.” The claim that these districts had “the same number” is also misleading, since their combined figures are given and the individual districts are not shown. The final comparison is cut off, leaving the 2000 figures for the other districts unreported. The response is also below the required 150 words. Select the main comparisons accurately and complete the summary.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic sequence from the overall city population to Manhattan and then the other districts, and linking phrases such as “Also” and “but” show an attempt to connect points. However, the response has no clear overview paragraph and the progression is weakened by vague references such as “the other pictures below” and “it,” whose meaning is not always clear. The final sentence ends abruptly at “In year 2000 the t,” so the comparison is incomplete and the text does not reach a proper conclusion. Organise the report into an introduction, an overview of the main trends, and paragraphs comparing the figures. Use precise references to the tables and districts rather than relying on “it” or “the other pictures.”

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant vocabulary, including “population,” “percentage,” “rise,” and “decrease,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, word choice and collocation are often imprecise: “impressive districts,” “huge number of population,” and “making the numbers more effectively” do not express the data naturally. “Small districts” is also misleading because the table groups four districts together rather than describing their individual size. There are spelling errors in “Brooklin” and “Stated Island,” and “his number” is an unsuitable reference to population. Aim for standard data-reporting language such as “the population increased,” “accounted for,” and “the combined population of the other districts.” Check place names carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and joined sentences, for example, “Manhattan is the second district … with a rise … but we can see an important decrease.” Meaning is usually recoverable, but grammatical control is uneven. The opening phrase “between 1800 to 2000” uses an incorrect preposition pattern, and “a rise of his number” has faulty reference and structure. Tense and time expressions are also inconsistent, as in “They started in 1800 … and rise in 1800,” while “up to 1,538,096 and 19%” does not clearly connect the figures. The last sentence is incomplete. Practise accurate past-tense reporting and complete sentences, and use clear structures such as “rose from … to …” and “accounted for … of the total.”

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