Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The tables illustrate the poppulation of New York City for the passed two centuries and its districts specifically Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island.

Popolation in New York City continued to rise for the passed two hundred years ago which shows a significant increase from thousands of citizens to millions of citizens. Most of the districts like Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island had recorded drastic increase in percentage of total population from 1800 to 2000. In contrast, Manhattan showed a marginal decrease in population in the second century after its significant increase in number of citizen in the first hundred years.

In conclusion, the large portion of New York City's increase in population were recorded from Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten for the last two centuries. Manhattan on the other contributed to this increase but did not last up until the year 2000 due to the reduced population.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main overall contrast: New York’s population grew substantially, while Manhattan’s share fell as the other districts became more important. You also correctly note that Manhattan rose before declining. However, the account is only partly developed: it gives no figures to show the scale of these changes, and “drastic increase in percentage” does not distinguish the other districts’ combined population from the individual districts, for which no separate figures are provided. The conclusion also says Manhattan contributed to the increase without clarifying that its population fell between 1900 and 2000. To strengthen the summary, report the city totals and compare Manhattan’s population and share with the combined figures for the other districts.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear, easy-to-follow sequence: an introduction, a paragraph describing the broad trends, and a concluding comparison. Linking expressions such as “In contrast” and “In conclusion” help signal the relationship between ideas, and the central contrast between Manhattan and the other districts is maintained. This provides coherent overall organisation. However, the conclusion largely repeats the previous paragraph rather than adding a precise synthesis, and the progression would be stronger if the main comparisons were grouped more systematically—for example, first the city’s total growth, then the changing balance between Manhattan and the other districts. Some references, such as “this increase,” could also be made more explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing trends, including “significant increase,” “marginal decrease,” and “percentage of total population.” These choices show an attempt to use language suited to data reporting. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “poppulation,” “Popolation,” and “passed” where “past” is intended. Some phrases are also imprecise or unnatural: “drastic increase in percentage” and “number of citizen” do not express the data clearly, while “large portion” is less suitable than a term such as “majority” for the 81% share. Aim for accurate, conventional collocations and use precise terms such as “population share” and “combined population.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of sentence forms, including a complex contrast introduced by “In contrast,” and most of the intended meaning can be followed. However, errors in sentence structure and agreement recur. For example, “the population … continued to rise … which shows” has an unclear relative clause, and “the large portion … increase … were recorded” has a subject–verb agreement problem. The phrase “for the passed two hundred years ago” also combines incompatible time expressions, while “Manhattan on the other contributed” is missing punctuation around the linking phrase. Work on constructing clear comparisons and checking agreement, articles, and time expressions; these corrections would make the trends easier to understand.

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