Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The first table illustrates the changes in overall population of New York City between 1800 and 2000,while other two tables tell about the population change in various towns of City.

Overall ,it is clearly evident that City has highest population by the last year.Manhatten has highest population ,but secohighest percentage by the 1900.While,other districts have highest population and percentage contribution by 2000.

The population of the city was 79216 at the beginning of the 1800.It increased about five times by the 1900 ,at [redacted phone].The population in 2000 was at [redacted phone] ,which is about eleven times the initial number.

The number in 1800 for Manhattan and other districts was 60515 and 18701 ,which accounted for 76% and 24% of the total population.In 1900, the number for Manhattan and other districts increased upto [redacted phone] and [redacted phone] respectively,which made up the 54% and 46% of the total population.In the final year,the number for manhatten showed a decline upto [redacted phone],while number for other districts showed a upward trend until [redacted phone] abd accounted for 81% of the total population which is highest among the categories.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You cover the main changes and include relevant figures for the city total, Manhattan, and the other districts. The overview identifies the shift in population share from Manhattan to the other districts, and the reported values are consistent with the tables. However, some comparisons are unclear or imprecise: “Manhattan has highest population, but secohighest percentage by the 1900” does not clearly explain that Manhattan had the largest district population in 1900 but its share had fallen to 54%. Also, saying the city’s population increased “about five times” by 1900 is inaccurate; it rose to roughly 43 times its 1800 level. Develop the key comparisons more precisely, especially the scale of overall growth and the changing balance between the districts.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs covering the city total and district figures. This makes the information reasonably easy to follow. You also use time markers such as “In 1900” and “In the final year” to guide the reader through the data. However, some links are mechanical or unclear, particularly “Overall … While, other districts…” and the sentence beginning “Manhattan has highest population.” The final paragraph also packs several years, figures, and comparisons into one long sequence. Use clearer transitions between the overview points and separate the district comparisons by period or trend so that the progression is more controlled.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a suitable range of task-related vocabulary, including “overall population,” “accounted for,” “percentage contribution,” “decline,” and “upward trend.” These choices help communicate the main data patterns. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “various towns of City,” “increased upto,” and “showed a upward trend.” There are also spelling and form errors, including “Manhatten,” “secohighest,” and “abd,” which reduce precision. Aim for standard data-reporting expressions and check spelling carefully; for example, describe the figures as populations of the city’s districts rather than towns, and use “rose to” or “increased to” when reporting a new value.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses with “which” and contrasts introduced by “while.” Most of the data remains understandable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity and control. For example, “The population in 2000 was at 8009185” uses an awkward construction, while “which made up the 54% and 46%” has an unnecessary article. The opening sentence also runs “2000,while” together, and the overview contains incomplete or poorly connected clauses, especially “Manhattan has highest population … by the 1900.While…” Use complete sentences, check articles and punctuation, and vary sentence structures while keeping each comparison grammatically clear.

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