Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Many people argue nowadays about longer holidays more than two months, I strongly agree because the longer rest children recieve the more mental peace they get.This essay will explain why by looking at the longest vacations gives benefits.

First and foremost,Giving students the study relief that they only get in a year in the form of vacations can help them recover from the academic pressure that they hold till their exams. For instance, A student who putted whole potential and focus on his exam will feel exhausted to heal from that he needs a long break from studies. As a result, After the break he feels more confident and more focused and will be able to perform extra in his next terms.

Another key point is that some people argue that vacations should not lasts more than 2 months because it became a generational thinking. As a example, If I talk about my own self or surroundings we always had our vacations in the month of june july since our childhood,According to parents It happens mainly because long vacations make students less serious about their studies and when they return to thier school they dont take their classes serious.Consequently,It affects their performance,studies and future.

In conclusion,I firmly believe that school vacations should lasts not more than 2 months, Mainly because this time period is more than enough for students to heal their brain and get back to their schools.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You address both questions in a basic way: the first body paragraph explains that a long break can help students recover from exam pressure, while the next presents the concern that extended holidays may reduce seriousness about school. However, the response does not maintain a clear position. The opening supports holidays longer than two months, but the conclusion argues they should not last more than two months. The arguments are also brief and only lightly supported; for example, the personal reference to June and July does not clearly demonstrate the effect on students’ performance. The response is 11 words below the required minimum. Develop each side with a specific explanation or example, and state a consistent view throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “First and foremost,” “Another key point,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the essay. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the second body paragraph moves from what “some people argue” to personal experience and then to parents’ views without clearly connecting these points. Several linking expressions, including “As a result” and “Consequently,” are used mechanically rather than showing a precise relationship between ideas. Improve cohesion by organising each paragraph around one clear claim, then explaining and illustrating it, and use pronouns or transitions that make the links between sentences explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “academic pressure,” “exhausted,” “confident,” and “performance,” which helps communicate the main ideas. There is also an attempt to use more formal expressions such as “First and foremost.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “study relief,” “putted whole potential,” and “perform extra.” Spelling errors, including “recieve” and “thier,” are noticeable, and informal phrasing such as “my own self” weakens the academic tone. Aim for more precise, natural combinations of words and check spelling carefully; this will make your meaning easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a conditional example beginning “If I talk about my own self or surroundings,” and a result clause with “As a result.” However, complex sentences are often not controlled accurately, and errors occur frequently enough to make some passages difficult to read. Examples include “the longer rest children recieve the more mental peace they get,” “vacations should not lasts,” and “when they return to thier school they dont take their classes serious.” These show problems with sentence boundaries, verb forms, agreement and adverb forms. Punctuation and spacing are also inconsistent, particularly around commas and full stops. Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea, then add subordinate clauses only when you can control their grammar.

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