Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this globalized era, Summer holidays of two months were held in many countries. In many countries these holidays are just because of weather. Weather was so hot in these days. But this is not a good thing for children's, Because air conditioners were installed every where in school and colleges and nowadays many children were go to school by cars. So I totally disagree with this notion.

Nowadays many people in all over the world cause many disease and cause death just because of this hot weather. Holidays are important for children's because they get sick very quickly. In school holidays some schools give online classes while other gave summer vacation tasks. Children's are the future of our countries so we can do any thing to keep them safe. For example in Europe many peoples died because of this heat stock. That is why these summer vacation's are very important.

First paramount reason is that, Children's got numb and lazy in these holidays, They do no work in these vacation's, they stay at home and play video games and use mobile phone's which is not good for children's. For example in Pakistan the school system was already not so good and these vacation's make students useless. These are not the only holidays in Pakistan a student go to their school and college's six month's in a year. Because some time there were school function's and some time school id closed because of some issues and some time school id closed because of labor day, etc. So we have to work to make our education system stable and strong by reducing these holiday's.

To sum up, Summer holidays are good for children's because of hot weather, while on the other hand vacations are not good for children's future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, discussing the value of holidays and arguments for shorter breaks. However, the development is inconsistent. The argument regarding the 'value' of holidays is somewhat confused, as you initially argue against them due to modern technology (air conditioning) but then pivot to defending them based on health risks. The second part regarding shorter holidays is better developed with specific references to the Pakistani education system. To improve, ensure your position is consistent throughout and that each paragraph focuses on a single, well-supported idea. Avoid contradictory statements within the same section to ensure your argument remains persuasive and clear to the reader.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or repetitive (e.g., 'In many countries', 'For example', 'some time'). The transition between ideas is sometimes abrupt, making the logical progression feel disjointed. For instance, the jump from discussing global heat to the specific situation in Pakistan lacks a smooth linking phrase. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each sentence flows naturally from the previous one, rather than relying on simple sentence starters.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There is frequent repetition of basic words like 'children's', 'holidays', and 'school'. Additionally, there are several word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'heat stock' (likely meaning heatstroke) and 'make students useless'. The use of apostrophes is also consistently incorrect (e.g., 'children's', 'vacation's', 'college's'), which suggests a misunderstanding of pluralization versus possession. Expanding your vocabulary to include more academic collocations and focusing on accurate spelling and punctuation will significantly improve your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures. While there are attempts at complex sentences, they are often marred by grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('holidays were held', 'children were go') and tense inconsistencies. Punctuation is also a concern, particularly the misuse of commas and the frequent, incorrect use of apostrophes for plural nouns. To improve, practice constructing more complex sentences using subordinating conjunctions (e.g., 'although', 'whereas', 'consequently') and pay closer attention to basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of plural forms without apostrophes.

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