Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In most nations, primary, as well as secondary schools vacate for 60 days or more in the summer break

On the one hand, longer school holiday can create a negative impact on the upbringing of the children, in the sense that the longer they remain at home the easier it is to forget what had been taught. As a result, the teachers will be faced with a more challenging task of trying to refresh their memories on a previously taught topic, this however kills time which can be used to engage in other new modules. Also this can expose the kids to danger as they tend to play away their time and indulge in so many despicable acts like joining a bad group as the teachers are not there to monitor their activities and most parents might be too busy to handle them, some can injure themselves while playing and totally forget themselves. For example, I remembered when I was in secondary school in the year 1999, on 9th of July during the long vacation, I was fully overwhelmed in playful mood that I forgot I needed to do my take-home assignment given to me by my teacher, until we resumed for the next session, my mind skipped the school work and I was heavily punished for not attending to my holiday project.

On the other hand, shorter school holidays are more rewarding because it will make the students to always remain embedded with school work and activities, thereby creating an avenue for them to constantly avoid danger and bad groups as their activities will be fully monitored by the teachers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt, discussing the value of long holidays and the arguments for shorter ones. However, the development is uneven. The first body paragraph provides a personal anecdote, which is acceptable, but the second paragraph is significantly underdeveloped, offering only a brief summary of the opposing view. To reach a higher band, you need to provide more balanced, detailed arguments for both sides. The position is clear, but the depth of analysis is limited, particularly regarding the benefits of long holidays, which were only discussed in terms of their negative impact on learning and safety.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices like 'On the one hand' and 'As a result' to link your thoughts. However, the transition between the personal example and the main argument is slightly abrupt. Additionally, some sentences are quite long and run-on, such as the one beginning with 'For example, I remembered...', which makes the flow feel a bit cluttered. Improving the use of punctuation and varying your linking words would help the essay read more smoothly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'upbringing', 'despicable acts', and 'embedded'. However, there are some issues with collocation and word choice. For instance, 'vacate' is used incorrectly here (it should be 'go on vacation' or 'close'), and 'fully overwhelmed in playful mood' is unnatural. You also repeat the phrase 'bad group' and 'activities' multiple times. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoid repeating the same vocabulary within short distances.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, they often suffer from punctuation errors, such as comma splices (e.g., '...taught topic, this however kills time...'). There are also minor grammatical slips, such as 'longer school holiday' (should be plural) and 'I remembered when I was... I was fully overwhelmed' (tense consistency issues). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focus on mastering sentence boundaries and subject-verb agreement.

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