Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

There is a too longs summer vacations for primary and secondary schools in many part of the world which is last for two months or more .

The long holidays is not good for students of primary and secondary schools because this is the age where the students develops there habit of studies and be in discipline. If the breaks are long then the student is not habitual of this kind of habits . And if the school is having short time breaks so the teachers and students both are not having stress to complete the course so then can study less because they have more time to complete the course . So i have experience this in my first semester there is a bridge which connects two side of the rode so the bridge is broken due to heavy rain so at that time we all are happy that we get holiday ,but when the classes are started again then i we have to complete the large amount of syllabus in short time so at that time we all have so much pressure to complete the course and prepare for the exam .

So that's why i prefer short breaks rather then long breaks

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you attempt to address both parts of the prompt, the arguments are underdeveloped and lack depth. For instance, you mention that long holidays are not good for study habits, but you do not explore the potential benefits of long breaks, such as student well-being or family time. The personal anecdote about the bridge is tangential and does not effectively support the argument regarding school holidays. To improve, you must expand your points with clear explanations and relevant examples, ensuring you meet the length requirement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear structure. There is no introduction or conclusion, and the body paragraphs are not well-organized. The use of cohesive devices is very limited, relying heavily on simple conjunctions like 'and' or 'so'. The progression of ideas is difficult to follow, particularly in the second paragraph where the narrative about the bridge interrupts the logical flow of the argument. To improve, you should use clear paragraphing (introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion) and a wider variety of linking words such as 'furthermore', 'consequently', or 'on the other hand' to connect your ideas logically.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive. You use simple terms like 'good', 'long', and 'short' throughout the text. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'too longs summer vacations' instead of 'excessively long summer vacations' and 'habitual of this kind of habits' which is redundant. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas effectively. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to education and academic life, and practice using synonyms to avoid repetition.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the long holidays is', 'the student develops there habit'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are run-on or fragmented, making the text difficult to read. You rely almost exclusively on simple sentence structures. To improve, you need to focus on basic grammatical accuracy, such as pluralization and verb tense consistency, and work on constructing more complex sentences using subordinate clauses.

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