Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In many countries, government allows the institutions to give holidays for couple of months because in some regions most of the time the climate remains the hot in summer and students are not have similar health condition to fight against the summer. However, primary and secondary schools students have less tendency to be patience in hot weather because of their small and weak body couldn't fight for long term but in the cold regions we can't say that primary and secondary schools remain open in harsh weathers because the capacity of the students is same, so there is advantage that the children have stay in the eyes of parents which also make their parent relax. In addition, some parents don't give time to their children in this way when the holidays time is over they often create problems to teachers and a change in habits have noticeable in way they behave.

Furthermore, summer holidays are important because of global warming and the change in diet also a problem because children eats the junk foods and consume unhealthy drinks in which their body become weak that they need rest to recover. While changing in climate, we have to take care of diet so in this way we could do activities in summer especially in Asia and some parts of Europe.

In conclusion, shorter holidays in summer have disadvantages and causes troubles so to avoid these problems giving 2 months of holidays save many lives and children have plenty of time to grow smartly and spending time with their parents and elders. So, the value of long summer holidays have a great impact on both children and environmental factor that is the main purpose of the government to make the country healthy and reliable.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to address both parts of the prompt regarding the value of long school holidays and the arguments for shorter ones. However, the development of ideas is often unclear and lacks logical extension. For instance, the argument concerning climate and students' health, mentioning that 'small and weak body couldn't fight for long term,' is underdeveloped and difficult to follow. While the writer touches on the role of parents and the impact on teachers, the reasoning often drifts into tangential points, such as global warming and diet. The position is discernible in the conclusion, but the overall progression of ideas feels disjointed and repetitive. Consequently, this performance aligns closely with Band 5, as the task is addressed only partially and ideas remain limited.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The text is structured into three paragraphs, but paragraphing is used inappropriately, particularly with the long, rambling opening paragraph that combines multiple disparate ideas. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, such as the abrupt transitions using 'However,' 'Furthermore,' and 'In addition.' The referencing is frequently unclear, making it hard to follow which subject pronouns like 'their' or 'they' refer to. There is no clear overall progression of information, and the sentences often run together without adequate logical links, resulting in a mechanical and confusing flow that fits Band 4 criteria.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used throughout the essay is basic, repetitive, and often unnatural. Examples include phrases like 'give holidays for couple of months,' 'stay in the eyes of parents,' and 'grow smartly.' There are numerous word choice and collocation errors, such as 'change in habits have noticeable in way they behave' and 'consume unhealthy drinks in which their body become weak.' The range of vocabulary is limited and inadequate for a standard academic response, frequently causing strain and confusion for the reader. This performance reflects the descriptors for Band 4.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, consisting mostly of overly long, poorly controlled complex sentences that are fraught with errors. Examples of serious grammatical inaccuracies include 'students are not have similar health condition,' 'the children have stay,' and 'diet also a problem because children eats.' Punctuation is largely neglected, with run-on sentences dominating the response. These frequent errors in grammar and mechanics significantly distort the meaning and cause ongoing difficulty for the reader, placing the writing firmly in Band 4.

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