Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In many countries , primary and secondry schools closed for two months or more in the summer holidays. holidys are good for children's mental health and if they closed schools for more then 3 or 4 months then it maybe show some disadvantages on the health of children.

In my opinion , primary schools must be closed once in a extrem seasons like hot weather and cold . if the held classes in extreamily hot wather then in result children must be sick by working and by not taking any reast betweet school working days . If students take some rest like in summers schools holidays are almost around two monthes so i think that this is important for better health of little once . For example ; in hot weather schools are open and children went to public schools where not any air conditioning so they must be sick of get fever .

Now i would like to talk about the other persective of time situation .

In coold wather school holidays are around one too two weeks . This is rude and unjustic act for little childs . in extreme coold weather thy go to schools and attend classes . and when weather is normal they anounce holidays and in cool weather holiday finished . This put an rude impect on the health of childrens and letter they become sick for cold.

In conclusion ; Primary schools must give more holidays almost for around 1 month to childrens for the sefty of their helth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to address both parts of the prompt regarding the value of long holidays and the arguments for shorter ones, focusing heavily on weather conditions and health. However, the development of ideas is limited and repetitive. For instance, the student mentions that holidays are good for mental health in the opening paragraph, but fails to develop this point, shifting immediately to physical weather conditions. The position is somewhat unclear due to erratic paragraphing and a lack of structured argumentation. While the response touches upon the main themes, the arguments are under-developed, aligning best with a Band 5 descriptor.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The essay lacks clear overall progression and logical organisation. Paragraphing is highly problematic; sentences are grouped into arbitrary blocks rather than cohesive paragraphs focusing on distinct ideas. Transitional phrases are either missing or misused, such as 'Now i would like to talk about the other persective of time situation.' Furthermore, referencing and pronouns are sometimes confusing, making it difficult to follow the logical flow between sentences. Cohesive devices are inadequate and mechanical, placing this response firmly in Band 4.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent spelling errors such as 'secondry', 'extream', 'wather', 'reast', 'monthes', 'persective', 'coold', 'unjustic', 'thy', 'anounce', 'impect', 'childrens', and 'sefty'. Words are often chosen incorrectly for the context, for example, 'unjustic act' instead of 'unfair practice' or 'rude impect' instead of 'negative impact'. The range of vocabulary is severely restricted, which occasionally strains the reader and fits the Band 4 descriptor.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. There is a very limited range of sentence structures, and attempts at complex sentences almost invariably contain significant errors, such as 'if they closed schools for more then 3 or 4 months then it maybe show some disadvantages'. Punctuation and capitalization are frequently incorrect (e.g., lowercase letters at the start of sentences, stray spaces before commas). Errors in tense, subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'children went... where not any air conditioning'), and prepositions occur in almost every sentence, meaning very few error-free sentences are produced. This corresponds to a Band 4.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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