Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In recent years, the topic of summer holidays has gained significant attention. While some people believe that discuss the advantages other argue thatdisadvantages. This essay will discuss both perspectives and present my opinion.

On the one hand, summer holidays provides several benefits. Firstly, its improve efficiency and convenience in daily life. Moverover, it saves time and resources. In summer holidays government primary and secondary school are closes in 2 month in Pakistan because there are everything close government colleges and schools in summer holidays in Pakistan temperture normally 40 degree plus. For example many people rely on it to manage their tasks effectively. Therefore, it plays a crucial rule in modern society.

On the other hand, there are certain disadvantages associated with summer holidays. It can lead to dependency and reduced physical activities. Additionally, it may negatively impact mental and social well-being.

There are very side effects on children health no facilities and no electricity and no A.c in installed inits is depends on government classes i will europen countryies there are to much good they built school very strongly and facilities are very good. For instance, excessive use can cause distraction. Hence, it is important to use it in a balance manner.

In my opinion although summer holidays has some drawback, its advantages and outweigh the disadvantages. This is because it enhances overall efficiency and provides greater opportunity for growth. Additionally, it may negative can be minimized.

In conclusion, while there are valid arguments on both sides, I believe that summer holidays is more beneficial as it contribute significantly to development and progress.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource4.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.0
Overall4.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response attempts to address both questions regarding the value of long school holidays and the arguments for shorter ones, but the development of ideas is heavily hindered by confusion and inappropriate memorized phrasing. The student writes phrases like 'discuss the advantages other argue thatdisadvantages' and brings up irrelevant points about electronic devices, excessive use, and air conditioning ('no electricity and no A.c in installed'), which shows a misunderstanding of the prompt. While there is a stated opinion, the arguments lack logical clarity and solid development. Examples cited are disjointed and overly generalized, failing to adequately explore the core themes of the prompt. Consequently, this performance aligns closely with Band 5, where the task is addressed only partially and ideas are limited or under-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The text is organized into paragraphs with basic introductory and concluding markers such as 'On the one hand' and 'In conclusion'. However, the overall progression is severely disrupted by confusing transitions and erratic sentence structures. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal paragraph coherence fails because sentences often introduce completely unrelated thoughts consecutively, such as jumping from school closures in Pakistan due to high temperatures straight to general task management. Referencing and cohesive devices are frequently mechanical or inaccurate (e.g., 'Moverover', 'Hence, it is important to use it in a balance manner'). There is a lack of clear logical flow throughout the body paragraphs. These issues firmly place the response at Band 5.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is very limited and repetitive, with basic everyday terms dominating the text ('efficiency', 'convenience', 'advantages', 'disadvantages'). There are numerous awkward word choices, incorrect collocations, and spelling errors, such as 'temperture', 'Moverover', 'rule' instead of 'role', and 'europen countryies'. Furthermore, the inclusion of phrases like 'excessive use can cause distraction' implies the writer is misapplying memorized vocabulary from a completely different writing prompt about mobile phones or screens. The vocabulary range is minimally adequate to convey a very basic meaning, but frequent errors cause strain for the reader, matching the Band 4 descriptor.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. There are constant, pervasive grammatical and punctuation errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('summer holidays provides', 'its improve'), tense inconsistencies ('school are closes'), and fragments or run-on sentences ('In summer holidays government primary and secondary school are closes in 2 month in Pakistan because there are everything close...'). These frequent errors cause considerable difficulty for the reader and significantly impede communication. This performance reflects the characteristics of a Band 4 grammatical score.

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