Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Most of the countries give longer period of vacations to children while While these extended breaks offer several benefits, some people believe that shorter holidays would be more beneficial. This essay will discuss the value of long school holidays and the arguments in favor of reducing their length.

One one hand, long school holidays help children to relax from the study pressure and spent quality time at home with their family. Moreover, they can also visit some scenic spots to gain exposure and knowledge. This can help them heal mentally from the burden they had during their academic year. However, children can also engage themselves in new activities during the summer break which can eventually boost up their creativity and innovation. For instance, they can learn a new hobby such as painting, baking ,gardening etc. as these innovative ideas can build up their cognitive ability more effectively.

On the other hand, as the world is progressing day by day, the education system need to be more advance and the curriculum should be designed in such a way that children should learn from it effectively. Shorter school holidays can help students maintain their academic progress. After a long break, children may forget some of the information they have learned, meaning that teachers need to spend additional time reviewing previous lessons. Shorter holidays can reduce this problem and help students maintain a regular study routine. Another advantage is that shorter breaks may be more convenient for working parents, who often struggle to arrange childcare during the summer. For instance, parents who work full-time may have to pay for childcare services or ask relatives to look after their children for several weeks.

In conclusion, long school holidays help students to take rest, spend time with their family and learn new activities while shorter school holidays help them to finish their academic year earlier and help retain their knowledge. In my view, a balanced school calendar with reasonably long breaks would provide the greatest benefit for the students and parents.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses both questions and maintains a clear overall position: long breaks allow rest, family time and new activities, while shorter breaks can support learning and help working parents. The examples of hobbies and childcare make the points relevant. The conclusion also offers a balanced view through the suggestion of “reasonably long breaks.” However, some ideas are developed more fully than others. The benefits of shorter holidays are explained through revision time and childcare, whereas the claim that shorter holidays help students “finish their academic year earlier” is not clearly explained or directly supported. To strengthen the response, develop each main point with a specific explanation or example and make the final comparison more precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a coherent overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two sides, and a conclusion. The progression from the benefits of long holidays to the case for shorter ones is easy to follow, and linking phrases such as “Moreover,” “For instance,” and “In conclusion” help signal relationships. Some cohesion is nevertheless mechanical or unclear. “One one hand” is an inaccurate opening transition, and the first body paragraph moves quickly from rest to travel to hobbies without clearly connecting these benefits. The conclusion also repeats several points rather than synthesising them. Use transitions accurately, group related ideas more tightly, and use clear references to show how each example supports its main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response uses enough vocabulary to discuss the topic and includes some relevant expressions, such as “academic progress,” “study routine,” “cognitive ability,” and “childcare services.” However, word choice and collocation are often imprecise, which limits the naturalness and flexibility of the language. Examples include “relax from the study pressure,” “heal mentally from the burden,” “boost up their creativity,” and “finish their academic year earlier.” Some wording is also repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “help” and “children.” Aim for more natural collocations and precise verbs, such as “recover from academic pressure,” “develop creativity,” and “retain what they have learned.” Check spelling and spacing as well, including “favour” consistently and the spacing in “baking, gardening.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

There is a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and several sentences communicate their meaning clearly, including the explanation that pupils may forget material after a long break. However, some grammatical errors remain and occasionally make the phrasing awkward. The opening contains a duplicated and conflicting construction (“Most of the countries… while While…”), and “One one hand” is also faulty. Other examples include “the education system need” instead of “needs,” “more advance” instead of “more advanced,” and “children to relax… and spent quality time,” where the verb forms should be parallel. The sentence beginning “Shorter school holidays can help…” is clearer and shows useful control of subordination. Proofread for agreement, verb forms, and sentence openings, and vary complex structures while keeping them accurate.

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