Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays which is according to the planned curriculum session designed by the goverment by following some reasons.

The countries like Pakistan, there are many warm regions in which temperture rises dramatically high during summer. In these areas, it is difficult to go out or to maintain proper bearable temperature everywhere due to which it is difficult to go out or carry out daily tasks especially for the children to travel to school and back home. Due to the current infrastructure of roads and hillarious traffic conditions, kids suffer the heat and get sick. For these reasons, goverments designs the session accodingly with these long breaks of hot season. Furthermore, the families moved to other cities especially in northern cold areas during this break to enjoy and spend some vacations to relax, which I think is the great advantage.

On the other hand

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response gives a relevant explanation for long summer holidays, especially the extreme heat in parts of Pakistan and the difficulty children face travelling to school. It also mentions families visiting cooler northern areas. However, the task asks both about the value of long holidays and arguments for shorter holidays, and the second part is not answered: “On the other hand” is left unfinished. The response therefore addresses the task only minimally, with limited development and no clear overall position. It is also 141 words, 109 short of the 250-word minimum; 17 words copied from the task prompt were excluded from the count. To improve, complete both sides of the discussion and support each with specific explanations or examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: the opening introduces the topic, and the next paragraph explains reasons for long holidays. Linking expressions such as “Furthermore” and “On the other hand” show an effort to connect ideas. However, the overall progression is incomplete and difficult to follow because the contrast signalled by “On the other hand” has no supporting point, and the response ends abruptly. Some connections within the main paragraph are also unclear, particularly the repeated explanation that it is difficult to go out and carry out daily tasks. Use separate paragraphs for the two questions, develop each point in a logical order, and ensure every linking phrase introduces a complete idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some topic-related vocabulary, including “summer holidays,” “temperature,” “infrastructure,” and “traffic conditions,” which helps communicate the general situation. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate or awkward choices make parts less clear, such as “planned curriculum session,” “bearable temperature everywhere,” and “hillarious traffic conditions.” Spelling errors such as “goverment,” “temperture,” and “accodingly” are noticeable. These issues fit a limited but minimally adequate range: the main meaning can usually be understood, but precision and natural phrasing are inconsistent. Build a more accurate set of expressions for heat, travel, school calendars, and the benefits or drawbacks of holiday length, and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts some longer sentence forms, for example the sentence beginning “In these areas, it is difficult to go out…” and the explanation introduced by “Due to…”. However, the range is limited, and complex sentences are often faulty or difficult to follow. In “which is according to the planned curriculum session,” the clause does not connect clearly to its subject; “governments designs” has a subject–verb agreement error; and “the families moved” shifts into an unsuitable past form. The repeated “due to which” construction also makes sentence relationships cumbersome. These frequent errors can cause difficulty for the reader, although the central point is generally recoverable. Practise shorter, controlled sentences first, then combine ideas with accurate relative clauses and conjunctions.

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