Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays.

What is the value of long school holidays?

What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In this essay, discuss arguments about schools long summer holidays. There are several countries are closed primary and secondary schools for two and three months in summer this action how to effect study and individuals what think about it. I strongly agree this step it has many advantages.

First and foremost, advantage of this deep is the students was spend great and momerable time with their family and friends. Furthermore, the learnt crucial activities in their holidays and unwind their minds. Relaxation are most essencial for students to get education freshly.

Moreover, summer is very hot season many puplis are use transport for reaching school the buses full of people they are feel uncomfortable. In addtion, they are overwhlemed every day this routine, in the result their mind exhausted they do not pay proper attention in theri study.

However, long holidays are better to relax and they are properly studing.

In conclusion, my point of view long summer

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.0
Coherence and Cohesion4.5
Lexical Resource4.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy4.5
Overall4.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies a relevant benefit of long holidays: students can spend time with family and friends, learn activities, and relax. It also gives a possible argument for shorter holidays by noting that hot weather and crowded buses can make travel uncomfortable and affect concentration. However, the task asks for the value of long holidays and arguments in favour of shorter holidays, and the second side is not clearly explained as a case for shortening the break. The position is also unclear: “I strongly agree this step” is not specific, and the conclusion ends unfinished. The response is substantially below the required 250 words, so both parts remain minimally addressed. Develop each argument with explanation or an example, and finish with a clear, complete conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: it opens with an introduction, uses “First and foremost” and “Moreover” to introduce points, and includes a conclusion marker. These features give the reader some indication of the intended structure. However, progression is difficult to follow because the introduction contains several unclear ideas, and the relationship between the hot-weather paragraph and the question about shorter holidays is not made explicit. The paragraph beginning “However” repeats the preference for long holidays rather than introducing a contrasting argument. The final sentence is incomplete, which leaves the response without a coherent ending. Use one paragraph for each side of the question, connect each reason to the relevant position, and complete the conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some topic-related vocabulary, including “primary and secondary schools,” “holidays,” “relaxation,” “transport,” and “attention.” There are also attempts at less basic expressions such as “crucial activities” and “pay proper attention.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms make meaning difficult to understand, as in “this action how to effect study,” “advantage of this deep,” and “overwhelmed every day this routine.” Spelling errors such as “momerable,” “puplis,” and “essencial” further reduce clarity. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling; for example, explain that a break allows students to “rest and return to school refreshed” rather than relying on unclear phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both simple statements and longer sentences, and some basic meaning can be understood. However, grammatical control is weak and errors occur frequently, sometimes obscuring the intended message. Examples include “There are several countries are closed,” which has an incorrect clause structure, and “the students was spend,” where the subject and verb form do not agree. “Relaxation are most essential” also has a subject–verb agreement error, while “they are properly studing” uses an unsuitable verb form. The opening and final sentences are incomplete or difficult to parse. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with clear subordinate clauses; check subject–verb agreement, tense, and sentence completeness during revision.

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