Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-15
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The charts below give information about a public library in a town called Little Chalfont.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The charts illustrates the proportion of open library in a packed street called little chalfont. Units are measured in numbers,
Overall the data presents in the vicinity of chalfont library four tupes of age individuals members. The rose loan on children,s fiction is 38% and the lowest is 1% is on children,s DVDs. Differents types of ages peoples are in chalfont library.
Almost 7 variety of loans in 2016 and its three tupes children,s fictions childen,s non-fiction and children DVDs. Teenagers which total loan is 38%. After this adults is the top number in crycle is 51 and the downest number is 12.
On the other hand in 2007 to 2012 number of loans taker is rising to nest year number rose from 15000 to [redacted phone] furthermore coming year number is almost same moreover in 2009 a little bit number grow whereby appeared 20000. At the end in 2016 final price is stayed on 20100. Which years is number od loans taker is fell is 2013.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
You identify several relevant features, including the largest membership group (adults aged 18–64, at 51%), the smallest group (those aged 65 and over, at 12%), and the 38% shares for children’s and adult fiction. However, the overview is unclear and does not accurately summarise the main patterns across all three visuals. Some figures are misreported: 38% is not the total loan share for teenagers, and the final loan total is about 21,700, not 20,100. The trend description also confuses years and values, including “158000” and a claim that 2009 reached 20,000. To improve, give a clear overview, then report a few accurate comparisons and describe the loan trend from 2007 to 2016 precisely.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response makes an attempt to separate general comments from details and uses linking expressions such as “Overall,” “After this,” and “On the other hand.” These provide some signposting, but the information is not arranged in a clear progression: membership figures, loan categories, and the time-series chart are mixed together, and some references are difficult to follow. For example, “After this adults is the top number in crycle” does not clearly connect to the preceding point about loan categories. The final paragraph also moves between years without a consistent sequence. Organise the response into a brief overview followed by separate paragraphs for the membership and loan-category data, then the trend chart. Use connectors only where they clarify the relationship between facts.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You use some task-related vocabulary, including “proportion,” “fiction,” “non-fiction,” “lowest,” and “number of loans,” so the reader can recognise the general subject. However, the range is basic and several inaccurate or misspelled expressions strain understanding. Phrases such as “open library in a packed street,” “rose loan,” “top number in crycle,” and “final price” do not describe the charts appropriately. There are also repeated spelling and word-form problems, including “tupes,” “Differents,” and “childen’s.” Build a reliable set of chart terms and check spelling: use “share” or “percentage” for the pie chart, “membership” for the age groups, and “loan total” for the line graph. Avoid adding descriptions not supported by the visuals.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response attempts both simple and longer sentences, but grammatical control is limited and errors frequently make relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “The charts illustrates” has subject–verb disagreement, while “Overall the data presents” uses an unsuitable verb pattern. In “After this adults is the top number,” the verb does not agree with the subject, and the sentence structure obscures the intended comparison. Several clauses are joined without clear punctuation, as in the final paragraph, and fragments such as “Which years is number od loans taker is fell is 2013” are difficult to interpret. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with clear clauses using “while,” “whereas,” or “from…to…”. Check agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries during revision.
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