Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-11
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Certain persons made a decision to minimize the number of times they travel by air yearly or to ristricts combine flights.It is very benificial for the environment. It would outweigh the disadvantages faced by persons and their businesses.In my openion, this decision of not to fly frequently will highly profitable for the targeted population and businesses as well.
In my view, introduction of ia this notion by certain persons is valueable.Advacement of this idea not only profiable decision for teh environment to reduce consumption of oil and revent air polution.For instance if the stackholders of some entrepreneurship intiate to communicate by using technology such as internet can minimise the use of air craft flights which altimately reduce the air pollution and is environmental friendly.This approachalso lowdown the disadvantages of having more fly times in a year.
Furthermore, I strongly agree taht this is a wise step. Reduction in the number of times they fly yearly or ban to fly altogether to less the expences.Different strategies should be used in saving resources.For example, travellling of one individual cost low as compare to the travelling cost of whole group for business purposes. Only required memebers should travel via airline.
In conclusion, initiative taken by some people effect the individuals and businesses as well.Certain person decided to lessen their flight frequency.This development not only benefits the environment but is also efficient for themselves.Such decisions can contribute in the accelerated progress of their ways of earning and become a reason of reduction in disadvantages,they might face otherwise.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You give a clear overall view that reducing air travel is beneficial and that the environmental gains outweigh the disadvantages. Relevant points include lower oil consumption and pollution, using internet communication for business, and limiting business travel to necessary staff. However, the comparison requested by the question is only partly developed: the disadvantages for individuals and businesses are not clearly explained, and the claim that the change is profitable or efficient is asserted rather than supported. The examples remain general, so the reader gets limited explanation of how reduced flying affects people or companies in practice. To strengthen the response, address specific costs or inconveniences of flying less, then weigh these against the environmental benefits and support each point with a clear example.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Its main direction is also understandable: it moves from environmental benefits to business travel and then restates the position. Linking expressions such as “For instance,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” help signal stages in the argument. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the first body paragraph shifts from pollution to disadvantages without explaining the connection, while the second introduces cost-saving strategies but does not fully develop them. Some references, such as “this approach” and “this development,” have unclear antecedents, and the conclusion repeats earlier claims rather than drawing the comparison together. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example explicitly to the point it supports.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “consumption of oil,” “air pollution,” “entrepreneurship,” “resources,” and “business purposes.” These choices show an effort to discuss environmental and economic effects rather than relying only on basic terms. However, spelling errors and inaccurate word choice are frequent and sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow, as in “ristricts combine flights,” “lowdown the disadvantages,” and “accelerated progress of their ways of earning.” Several expressions are also unnatural or imprecise, including “targeted population” and “more fly times.” Build a reliable set of topic phrases and check spelling and collocations carefully. Prefer straightforward, accurate wording over ambitious expressions whose meaning is unclear.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with clauses, for example, “For instance if the stackholders… can minimise… which altimately reduce…” This shows some effort to vary sentence structure. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in verb forms, articles, agreement and sentence construction frequently affect clarity. Examples include “this decision of not to fly frequently will highly profitable,” “which … reduce the air pollution,” and “Reduction in the number of times they fly yearly or ban to fly altogether to less the expences.” Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after full stops and commas. Practise building accurate sentences around one main clause, then add subordinate clauses only when their grammatical links are clear. Proofread for complete verbs and agreement.
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