Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Flying most of the times is beneficial as it is less time-consuming. In this developed world, the number of travel by fly gradually increased. Reduction of flying has a huge impact on the environment. I completely agree with the given statement.

Initially, the number of flying is beneficial for the environment due to the fact that on land people use vehicles as a source of transportation, It concluded different types. They produce a lot of noice and smoke too which makes the environment more polluted. Travelling through air such as, planes do not affect the environment nor produce pollution neither noice.

Most of the time, people usually travel by fly because it is convinient and relaxing.

The business metings are carried out by flying. Business man's should be puntual in their work and meeting so they easily took a flight and go where ever they want to. From my perspective, the disadvantages for businesses and individuals is over tooked by the environmental benefits after its development.

Moreover, people fly to see beautiful and gorgeous seens which includes mountains, seas, rivers and other. Plane flys over the mountains so they does not produce any pollution in the air. Eventually they produce a lot of noice but as they are 30-50 miles up from the land in air so it do not affact humans and other working people.

Taking everything into account, there are numerous advantages and disadvntages too. However, the businesses will face more difficultirs in order to reduce the number of fly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a clear position—“I completely agree”—and return to the idea that environmental benefits outweigh business difficulties in the conclusion. However, the response only minimally addresses the central comparison. Much of the reasoning is unclear or contradicts the task: you claim planes “do not affect the environment nor produce pollution,” then acknowledge that flying creates noise, without explaining its environmental impact. The discussion of business meetings identifies a possible disadvantage but does not develop its consequences or weigh them against specific environmental gains. The sightseeing point is also not clearly connected to the question. To strengthen the response, explain how reducing flights lowers emissions, then compare that benefit with concrete effects on travel and business, supporting each point with relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has separate paragraphs and uses basic signposts such as “Initially,” “Moreover,” and “Taking everything into account.” These give the reader some indication of structure. However, ideas are not arranged in a coherent line of argument: the opening says flying is beneficial, the next paragraph argues that planes do not pollute, and later paragraphs discuss meetings and sightseeing without clearly linking them to the stated position. Some connections are difficult to follow, particularly “the disadvantages for businesses and individuals is over tooked by the environmental benefits after its development.” Build a clearer progression: introduce your position, explain environmental benefits, consider individual and business disadvantages, and then compare them. Use linking phrases to show cause, contrast, and consequence rather than relying mainly on paragraph-opening markers.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “transportation,” “environment,” “pollution,” and “business meetings,” and attempt more descriptive language such as “convenient and relaxing.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make ideas unclear. Examples include “number of travel by fly,” “business man’s,” and “disadvantages … is over tooked.” There are also noticeable spelling errors, such as “noice,” “convinient,” “punctual,” and “difficultirs,” which reduce accuracy. Aim to learn common topic phrases as complete units—for example, “reduce air travel,” “carbon emissions,” and “face operational difficulties”—and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you express the comparison and environmental effects clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple sentences and longer structures, including “because” and “so,” and the main position can be identified. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in sentence construction, agreement, verb forms, articles, and punctuation. For example, “the number of flying is beneficial” has an unclear subject and agreement, while “Plane flys … so they does not produce” contains inconsistent number and verb forms. In “the disadvantages … is over tooked,” the subject–verb agreement and verb construction are faulty. Several sentences also run ideas together or use commas where a full stop is needed. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses using “although,” “because,” and “while.”

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