Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In recent years it has mostly discussed issue about the reduction the number of times fly every year or to stop flying altogether. it has greater impact on environment.

In my opinion, some people believed that reduction of flying impact on environment, due to reduction of flying in one day also reduction air pollution. Some people are moved to abroad alone for their business purpose and some people fly for trip with families it is greater beneficial to economy. For example if more people reserved their seats are moved to abroad more the beneficial to economy. But due to overloaded aeroplanes flies in sky mostly created air pollution and it is harmful for birds.

On the other side, some people believed that moving with families for visit visa and and business meeting. Mostly people moved abroad to visit visa from one country to other country they through garbage everywhere and create environmental pollution. Some people threw wastes in water near the sea and creates difficulities for marine environment in which they are polluted from wastes and then they are died in water and most of the species are died due to these wastes.

In conclusion, flying aeroplenes makes air pollution and and moving to abroad creates the environmental pollution, even the individual and business it creates the development disadvantages to environment

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response recognises that flying can contribute to air pollution and attempts to discuss effects on individuals, businesses and the environment. However, it does not clearly answer the central question of whether the environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages: the opening suggests a benefit, while the conclusion mainly repeats that flying causes pollution without making a clear comparison. The discussion of business travel and economic benefits is brief, and the claims about tourists leaving rubbish and harming marine life are not clearly connected to reducing flights. The response also contains 213 words, so it is 37 words below the required minimum; the eight words copied from the prompt were not counted. Develop a consistent position, explain both sides with relevant examples, and meet the minimum length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs beginning with contrasting signals, and a conclusion, so there is a basic attempt to organise the discussion. The use of “In my opinion,” “For example,” and “On the other side” helps indicate the intended direction. However, progression within paragraphs is difficult to follow: the first body paragraph shifts from reduced flying to business travel, then to overloaded aeroplanes, while the second moves from travel visas to litter and marine deaths. Connections between these points are often unclear, and repeated “some people” phrasing makes the flow mechanical. Group related ideas together and use clear cause-and-effect links so each paragraph develops one main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some topic-related vocabulary, including “air pollution,” “economy,” “business meeting,” and “marine environment,” which allows the reader to identify the general subject. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repeated or imprecise, such as “moving to abroad” and “creates the environmental pollution.” Some word choices make the intended meaning difficult to interpret, including “visit visa” in the discussion of travel and “overloaded aeroplanes flies in sky.” Spelling errors such as “difficulities” and “aeroplenes” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of expressions for flight reduction, emissions, travel costs and environmental effects, and check spelling and natural word combinations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to use both simple statements and longer sentences with reasons, examples and contrast, as in “But due to overloaded aeroplanes flies in sky mostly created air pollution.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction and verb forms frequently make relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “some people believed that reduction of flying impact on environment” lacks a clear grammatical structure, while “they are died in water” uses an incorrect verb form. Agreement and articles are also problematic, as in “aeroplanes flies” and “the reduction the number.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including the lowercase “it” after the opening full stop. Practise accurate basic clauses before extending them with subordinate clauses.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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