Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In recent years, several people have opinion to curtail the trips they take by air and some have decided to not to fly at all. It is widely believed that this issue has significant in modern societies. While this trend offers several benefits but it also raises concerns regarding enviromental advantages of this development.

This essay will discuss both advantages and disadvantages of this on individuals and bussiness.

To initiate with advantages of reducing of number of fly, one key benefit is individuals will have some of time to spend with theirs loved onces. for example on a certain occasion they can make their presence avaible and show their family that they also matter to them and this can remove misunderstandings between them and they can reschedule their business meeting for anyother time.

On the other hand, there are also seve

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response begins to address the topic by mentioning reduced flying and a possible personal benefit: having more time for loved ones. However, it does not answer the central question of whether environmental benefits outweigh disadvantages for individuals and businesses. Environmental effects are not explained, and the business impact is only briefly touched on through rescheduling a meeting. The position is therefore unclear, and the ideas are too limited and under-developed to support a comparison. The response also stops mid-sentence (“there are also seve”), so the discussion and conclusion are missing. It is 109 words below the required minimum. To improve, state a clear view and develop both environmental benefits and relevant costs for individuals and businesses with specific explanations or examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to organise the response with an introduction, a paragraph beginning “To initiate with advantages,” and a contrast marker, “On the other hand.” These signals show an intended progression from benefits to disadvantages. However, the development is very brief, and the final paragraph ends abruptly, so the reader cannot follow a complete argument or see how the points relate to the question. Some linking is also awkward: “While this trend offers several benefits but…” combines two contrasting structures, and the opening paragraph repeats the intention to discuss advantages and disadvantages without advancing the argument. Use a clear paragraph for each main point, connect explanations to the environmental and economic comparison, and finish with a conclusion that restates your judgement.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some topic-related vocabulary, including “curtail,” “trips,” “business meeting,” and “environmental,” and attempts to express ideas about family relationships and work. However, the range is limited, and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “have opinion,” “significant in modern societies,” and “reducing of number of fly.” Spelling errors such as “enviromental,” “bussiness,” and “avaible” also reduce accuracy. These issues sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to interpret, particularly in the opening. Build a more precise set of terms for the task, such as emissions, carbon footprint, travel costs, and business connectivity, and check spelling and natural word combinations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “the trips they take by air” and a conditional example beginning “on a certain occasion they can…”. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction and forms sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “some people have opinion” is missing a determiner, “decided to not to fly” has an incorrect infinitive pattern, and “While this trend offers several benefits but…” uses incompatible conjunctions. There are also problems with agreement and possessives in “their loved onces” and with sentence boundaries and capitalisation after “for example.” Practise accurate clause patterns and proofread each sentence for articles, verb forms, agreement, and punctuation.

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