Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-07-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
An increasing number of people choose to reduce their travel via aeronautics. From my perspective, environmental benefits of limited times of flying outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses.in terms of recovery.
One of the major benefits of reducing the number of flying is protecting our environment.The gas and fuel that is being used for airplanes can harm the ecosystem by emitting carbon and greenhouse resulting to disastrous long-term effects like climate change and flooding .Additionally, it is more practical and convenient for people especially in the middle class. For instance, a Filipino who is an overseas Filipino worker. Filipinos are well-known as family oriented, so it is typical for them to gather and celebrate their small wins together, even though it takes miles away. However, in this economy, where everything is expensive and inflated, it is more convenient to go home for holidays and special occasions only. A single sacrifice could mean a lot.
On the other hand, there are disadvantages to individuals, especially businesses. Some businesses require face-to-face interaction and business transactions, like visiting a construction site or sealing an important deal. Although video-conferencing is possible, some formal negotiations are better to do onsite for more assessment and objective observation, which is why many business tycoons prefers travelling, which they consider as investment rather than expensive.
In conclusion, prioritizing our nature is our great responsibility as humans because it has a long-term effect once it is destroyed, unlike for business which can recover quickly as time goes by.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
Tinutugunan ng sanaysay ang lahat ng bahagi ng prompt, na malinaw na nagsasaad ng posisyon na mas matimbang ang environmental benefits kaysa sa mga disadvantages. Gayunpaman, ang pagbuo ng mga ideya ay medyo hindi balanse. Malinaw ang environmental argument, ngunit ang bahagi tungkol sa mga disadvantages para sa indibidwal at negosyo ay hindi gaanong suportado. Ang halimbawa ng Filipino worker ay medyo malayo sa paksa at hindi lubos na nakakonekta sa mas malawak na economic impact sa mga negosyo na binanggit sa prompt. Para maabot ang mas mataas na band, siguraduhin na ang bawat halimbawa ay direktang sumusuporta sa pangunahing argumento tungkol sa trade-off sa pagitan ng environmental protection at economic/individual convenience.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
Ang sanaysay ay nakaayos sa mga lohikal na talata, na ang bawat isa ay may malinaw na pokus. Gumamit ng mga cohesive device, gaya ng 'Additionally', 'On the other hand', at 'In conclusion', na nakakatulong sa mambabasa na masundan ang daloy ng mga ideya. Gayunpaman, ang ilang transition ay medyo mekanikal, at ang koneksyon sa pagitan ng mga pangungusap sa loob ng mga talata ay maaaring mas maging swabe. Halimbawa, ang transition mula sa environmental impact patungo sa personal na halimbawa ng Filipino worker ay tila biglaan. Ang pagpapabuti sa paggamit ng referencing at pagtiyak na ang bawat pangungusap ay lohikal na nakabatay sa nauna ay magpapahusay sa pangkalahatang coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
Ang bokabularyo ay karaniwang sapat para sa task, na may ilang pagtatangka sa mas sopistikadong wika gaya ng 'aeronautics', 'ecosystem', at 'business tycoons'. Gayunpaman, may ilang kamalian sa pagpili ng salita at collocation, gaya ng 'limited times of flying' (dapat ay 'reducing the frequency of flights') at 'prioritizing our nature' (dapat ay 'prioritizing the environment'). Ang pariralang 'resulting to' ay isang karaniwang pagkakamali; dapat itong 'resulting in'. Bagama't sapat ang range para maiparating ang kahulugan, ang mas tumpak at natural na mga collocation ay magpapataas ng score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
Ang sanaysay ay gumagamit ng halo ng simple at komplikadong istruktura ng pangungusap. May ilang grammatical errors, gaya ng 'reducing the number of flying' (dapat ay 'reducing the number of flights'), 'many business tycoons prefers' (subject-verb agreement error), at mga isyu sa pagbabantas gaya ng mga kulang na espasyo pagkatapos ng tuldok. Bagama't hindi hinahadlangan ng mga pagkakamaling ito ang komunikasyon, madalas ang mga ito kaya hindi ka makakuha ng mas mataas na score. Para mag-improve, mag-focus sa subject-verb agreement at consistent na pagbabantas, at subukang magsama ng mas malawak na iba't ibang komplikadong istruktura ng pangungusap nang may mas mataas na katumpakan.
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