Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
Many people prefer shopping online rather than visiting physical stores.
Why has online shopping become so popular?
What impact has this had on traditional shops?
In recent years, the greater number of people admire online shopping over visiting traditional stores. While, this trend has becoming widely popular because of their flexibility and diverse variety, this has declined the sales of physical stores.
On the one hand, the major reason why individuals prefer to shop online is that online centers are available 24/7, making convenient to shop especially, for those who has hectic schedule and cannot go to stores. Another significant reason is wide range of products, which means people have several online options to choose and compare their selections and can go thought number of products with descriptions at their convenience. For instance, shopping lovers prefer to explore digital stores these days, which increase the demand of online and make it popular among people. Therefore, online shopping websites are play a vital role in people's lives to check different items at their free time.
On the other hand, the demand of online shopping adversely effected the popularity of traditional stores. In other words, people are workaholic and hardly get time to visiting physical centers for shopping, which is even more time consuming for them. Additionally, traditional stores are normally open for limited hours and makes individual's restricted to visit them in their free time. To exemplify, people prefer to save their essential time, which they can utilize on other tasks, therefore they do not like to visit stores, which decrease the popularity in-person stores.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 1.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 1.0
The response is completely off-topic. The prompt asks for an essay regarding the environmental benefits and disadvantages of reducing air travel. However, the student has written an essay about the popularity of online shopping versus traditional stores. Because the response does not address the task prompt at all, it fails to meet the requirements of Task Achievement. Even if the content were relevant, the ideas are repetitive and lack the depth required for a higher band score. To improve, it is essential to carefully read the prompt and ensure the response directly answers the specific question asked.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs with an introduction and two body paragraphs. There is an attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand', which provides a basic structure. However, the progression of ideas is limited by the lack of relevance to the topic. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical. To improve, the student should focus on developing a logical argument that directly supports a clear thesis statement related to the actual prompt.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is adequate for basic communication but lacks the range and precision expected for higher bands. There are several awkward collocations and word choice errors, such as 'admire online shopping' (instead of 'prefer') and 'online centers' (instead of 'online retailers'). The student relies on repetitive phrasing like 'traditional stores' and 'online shopping'. To achieve a higher score, the student should aim to use a wider variety of topic-specific vocabulary and demonstrate better control over word choice and collocation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'this trend has becoming' (incorrect verb form), 'those who has hectic schedule' (subject-verb agreement error), and 'online shopping websites are play a vital role' (incorrect verb structure). While there is an attempt to use complex sentences, they are often marred by these persistent errors. The student needs to focus on basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and correct verb tense usage to improve accuracy before attempting more complex structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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