Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this modern era, many people have decided to decrease the number of times they fly or to stop flying altogether. This essay will dwells on the statement and validate that environment benefits of development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses
On the one hand, technology is increasing rapidly nowadays and people are travelling to many countries for many purpose which are personal or for other business purposes. mostly individuals travels on tour packages to many other countries, this is increasing day by day and consuming gallons of fuels everyday and many aircrafts has pressure on the pilot to drive it in any climate which leads to accidents. For example, in India, news have been reported that conservation of fuels economy has been increased by the lees number of passengers in recent months.
On the other hand, numerous individuals are depended on air transportation to travel from countries to countries for personal and business needs such as transportation of goods and resources for the development of the company, people who migrate to other countries may need to return to their home nation has only a single mode of transportation which is through air. For instance, numerous magazines has printed out that due to limited number of passengers who travel through air has caused the restriction to departure of aircrafts due to insufficient passengers
To conclude some people have decided to reduce the number of time they fly every year this leads to many problems to the peoples who immigrate to numerous countries for job because of the decrease in the number of passengers.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt but lacks depth in its arguments. While you state your position in the introduction, the body paragraphs do not clearly weigh the environmental benefits against the disadvantages. The argument regarding 'fuel economy' in India is unclear and lacks a logical connection to the prompt. Furthermore, the conclusion does not summarize the main points or provide a final verdict on whether the benefits outweigh the disadvantages, leaving the position underdeveloped. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a clear, distinct point that directly supports your thesis, and provide more logical, well-explained examples.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive start. However, the progression of ideas is often disjointed. Transitions like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are used, but the internal logic within paragraphs is weak. For instance, the transition from discussing air travel to 'accidents' and 'fuel economy' in the first body paragraph is confusing. Additionally, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or inaccurate, such as the repetitive use of 'many' and 'numerous'. Improving the flow between sentences and ensuring that each idea logically follows the previous one will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary range is limited and often repetitive. You frequently use basic words like 'many', 'people', and 'travel'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'dwells on the statement' (which is not the correct usage) and 'conservation of fuels economy'. Some phrases are awkward, such as 'news have been reported' and 'magazines has printed out'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'carbon footprint', 'aviation industry', 'economic implications', or 'sustainable alternatives', and focus on using words in their correct collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede communication. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('this essay will dwells', 'many aircrafts has pressure', 'numerous magazines has printed out') and incorrect sentence structures. The use of articles and prepositions is also inconsistent. While you attempt some complex sentences, they are often grammatically flawed. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and singular/plural noun usage. Proofreading your work for these common errors before finishing will help you achieve a higher level of accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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