Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Air transport is considered to be one of the most efficient ways of travelling. However, many people in recent days are deducting their travel times anually and sometimes bashing it completely. I firmly believe that the advantages it poses to environment way outweighs the demerits it contribute to individuals and businesses.

One of the major benefits it contribute to environment is that it helps to reduce air pollution. As people travel less via airplane, the airlines are forced to halt their services which results in less air traffic. Consequently, it can contribute to encourage road transport which operates on electric energy such as bullet trains and EV buses which are more environment friendly. Many experts believe that, this change can help birds to migrate easily and make the ecosystem more functional as they can travel without any hinderances. For instance, the birds which migrate via the great migration route can easily fly without any disturbance from foreign objects flying in the sky.

On the other hand, it is undesirable for businesses and certain individuals as a whole if the airlines shut downs. Firstly, it can largely impact the airline companies who have invested a lot of money on this transportation system if people travel less via air route. As a result, such businesses can go bankrupt and individuals working there might loose thier jobs. Similarly, business personnels who travel via flights for emergency meetings might not be able to continue the service as it can shut entirely or the tickets can become really expensive.

In conclusion, even if it affects some businesses and individuals, I strongly believe that protecting the environment is more important as such individuals can get another job but we dont get another air to breathe or a functional eco system to live in.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed all parts of the prompt and maintained a clear position throughout. Your arguments regarding environmental benefits versus economic disadvantages are relevant and logically structured. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the point about birds migrating is a bit tenuous and lacks a strong connection to the core argument of air travel reduction. To reach a higher band, ensure that your supporting examples are more grounded in reality or broader societal impacts. The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, reinforcing your position that environmental preservation takes precedence over economic concerns.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central topic. You use cohesive devices such as 'Consequently', 'For instance', and 'On the other hand' to link your ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition from discussing air traffic to road transport is a bit abrupt. Additionally, the referencing is generally clear, though the logical progression within the second paragraph could be tightened to ensure the argument builds more naturally toward your conclusion. Overall, the structure is logical and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'efficient', 'bankrupt', and 'functional'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'deducting their travel times' (instead of reducing), 'bashing it' (too informal), and 'business personnels' (personnel is already plural). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit your score. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoid informal phrasing. Expanding your range of topic-specific vocabulary related to environmental science and economics would also be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is a good start. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'way outweighs' (should be 'far outweighs'), 'it contribute' (subject-verb agreement), 'loose thier jobs' (spelling/word choice), and 'we dont get another air' (article usage). While these errors rarely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement, pluralization, and basic spelling. Incorporating a wider variety of complex sentence structures, such as conditional clauses or passive voice, while maintaining accuracy, will help you progress.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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