Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Many people have planed to low the number of times they take off every year or to decrease it or to stop flying altogether.

In my viewpoint , it gives many benefit to all of us and we also face many problem by following this rule because it can generate many problems about community business, financial carrier and all of their responsibilities which they held out of country. But people can gain many benefits by following this prescription.

In my opinion, it can create many problems which we have to face after that rule because in this age of time all the community have their own business out of country. It can give them a big loss. For Example, people get a big loss in business. This rule can be very danger for all of us because we can't survive in our country for a long time. we have to go out of country to earn such facilities.

By viewing all of of the points, we concerned that it can give a big loss to us. So we need to give a prescription to government to don't follow that rule because it create very difficult things for all of us.For Example, big loss of abroad students.

Government should need to decline that plan because can create many problems

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you attempt to address the prompt by mentioning both benefits and disadvantages, the arguments are repetitive and lack depth. You do not provide specific examples or logical reasoning to support your position; for instance, the mention of 'abroad students' is vague and not clearly linked to the environmental context. The position is somewhat contradictory, as you acknowledge benefits but ultimately argue against the trend without providing a balanced analysis. To improve, ensure you fully explore both sides of the argument with concrete examples and meet the length requirement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The essay lacks a clear structure. While there are paragraph breaks, the progression of ideas is disjointed and repetitive. Cohesive devices are largely absent or used incorrectly, such as the repetitive use of 'For Example' without providing substantive evidence. The transition between the environmental benefits and the economic disadvantages is abrupt, making it difficult for the reader to follow your line of reasoning. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'on the other hand') and ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed idea that logically connects to the next.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very limited and often inaccurate. You rely on basic, repetitive phrasing such as 'big loss', 'many problems', and 'give many benefit'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'financial carrier' (likely meaning 'career') and 'prescription' (used incorrectly to mean 'suggestion' or 'policy'). The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas effectively. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific collocations related to the environment and economics, and try to avoid repeating the same simple adjectives and nouns throughout your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Many people have planed'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'to low the number'), and missing articles. Sentence structures are simple and often fragmented, such as 'Government should need to decline that plan because can create many problems'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces before commas. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and proofreading for common errors like tense consistency and pluralization.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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