Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, Tourism has become more common among people and they love to explore new environment and diverse cultures.It has some benefits for individuals and businesses as well. Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year because it causes several issues to ecosystem. I believe that, environmental benefits of this development are more significant than the drawbacks for the government and companies.

First and foremost, more and more people visits a country every year from every corner of the world. Consequently it results into overcrowding and cause problems for the citizens such as massive havoc on the road result into traffic jam. For instance, Istanbul which is one of the famous site for the tours, always crowded with tourists and it increase burden on the authorities of the city to manage all the transportation system.

Secondly, mass tourism result into environmental pollution. People from different nations visit other countries and they don't care about the cleanliness. Additionally, the historical places always crowded with visitors and they throw garbage everywhere that badly effects the surroundings.

On the other hand, tourism has also some benefits for the states and companies. For example, when people made reservation for expensive flights, Consequently, it results into long term prosperity of the economy. Furthermore, people also love to do shopping there, and booked hotels and like to eat delicious food.

In conclusion, although tourism has some advantages for the business and individuals, I believe its disadvantages has more negative connsequences for the environment because it promotes overcrowding and pollution. it can be reduces by individua

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt but lacks depth in its development. While you state your position clearly in the introduction, the arguments regarding the disadvantages for individuals and businesses are somewhat superficial. For example, you mention 'long term prosperity of the economy' but do not explain how this is impacted by a reduction in flights. The essay also ends abruptly mid-sentence, which prevents a full conclusion. To improve, ensure each body paragraph provides a clear link between the environmental choice (reducing flights) and the specific impact on the stakeholders mentioned in the prompt. The focus on general tourism rather than the specific act of 'reducing flights' also limits the relevance of some points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'First and foremost', 'Secondly', and 'On the other hand'. However, the flow is sometimes mechanical, and the logical progression within paragraphs is occasionally weak. For instance, the transition from discussing environmental pollution to the benefits for states is abrupt. Additionally, the incomplete final sentence significantly disrupts the coherence of the conclusion. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph develops a single, clear idea that connects logically to the next.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You use some repetitive phrasing, such as 'people' and 'countries'. There are also minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'massive havoc on the road' and 'made reservation for expensive flights'. To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to environmental science and economics, such as 'carbon footprint', 'sustainable tourism', or 'economic stimulus'. Avoid basic errors in word forms, such as 'effects' instead of 'affects' when used as a verb.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'more and more people visits', 'tourism result into') and incorrect article usage. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing after periods and commas. While you attempt complex sentences, they are often marred by these errors. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and proofreading for punctuation errors. Increasing the variety of complex structures, such as using conditional sentences or passive voice, would also help boost your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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