Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is generally observed that few individuals have decided that they will not fly many times in a year or they will stop flying altogether. Although this notion has more merit them demerits. The reasons behind this will be discussed in upcoming paragraphs.

To commence with, there are plethora of reasons why decreasing flights have environmental benefits. The first and foremost is disadvantageous for individuals and businesses. The first and foremost is loss in particular. To explain it, if people will reduce flying then it will have major impact on their business or jobs. There are fixed appointments of individuals in foreign countries where they can only go through flights. So it will leads to major loss. For instance, during world war in world between USA and Iran flights got stopped for few days. which causes large impact on Indian economic growth. Moreover, delay

health treatments. To justify it, if masses will not travel via flight than for long time period then there will be delay in treatment for example, some people have to go in another countries for better treatment for chronic diseases like cancer if there will be delay then it will leads to death.

Furthermore, deets it will leads to decline in economic growth of country. To elaborate it, if people will travel less through planes then less revenue will be generated for country. for instance, in past few months in india there are indigo airline these airline get large loss due to bad feedback. However, there are some benefits of it like environment will become pollution free. To articulate it, if less aeroplanes will fly in air less diesel will burn and it will cause less air pollution which is beneficial for nature.

To conclude, Although loss in bussiness, delay in treatments and reduction in economic growth are disadvantage yet, pollution free environment cannot be neglected.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt but lacks a clear, consistent position. While you mention both benefits and disadvantages, the argument is underdeveloped. For example, the point about medical treatments is relevant but lacks a logical connection to the prompt's focus on flying. The discussion of economic growth is repetitive, and the conclusion is abrupt. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-supported idea that directly answers whether the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. The current structure feels like a list of points rather than a cohesive argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay uses basic cohesive devices like 'To commence with' and 'Furthermore', but these are often used mechanically or incorrectly. Paragraphing is present, but the internal flow is disjointed. For instance, the sentence 'Moreover, delay health treatments' is a fragment that lacks a proper transition from the previous paragraph. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the logical progression of ideas is frequently interrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. To improve, focus on using transition words that link ideas logically rather than just marking the start of a new point.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'loss', 'impact', and 'benefits'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'deets' (which appears to be a typo) and 'less aeroplanes will fly in air'. Some phrases are used incorrectly, such as 'merit them demerits' instead of 'merits than demerits'. To reach a higher band, you need to use a wider range of vocabulary, including less common items and more precise collocations related to environmental and economic topics.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('it will leads to'), article usage ('in india', 'in world'), and sentence structure (fragments like 'Moreover, delay health treatments'). Complex sentence structures are attempted but are often faulty, leading to confusion. The punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of periods and capitalization. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like subject-verb agreement and missing articles before attempting more complex structures.

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