Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this modern era , with rise in business industry travelling by air also experienced an upward trajectory . Majority of people argue that taking multiple flights in year lead to rise of environmental damage and loss of capital of a business. In my opinion, entrepreneur's have business meeting all around the globe in different time zones. Therefore, an air trip is the only life saver for them.
To commence , the environment is facing harsh issues due to emission of green house gases emitted through various vehicles travelling around the globe. For instance, air-planes emit a large volume of gases which are harmful for the nature, contributing highest in damaging the world's ecosystem which leads to air pollution. Further, birds and insects present in the atmosphere are highly affected by the harmful gases. Eventually, they start to die and moving towards the threat of extinction which is an alarming concern in today's world as species evolving in the environment are responsible for maintaining the ecosystem by performing unique functions.
On the other hand, flights act as a powerful means of travel in the business sector. For example, if a company's chief executive officer has an urgent meeting in Dubai in the morning but on the same in the he has a meeting in Mumbai so he can efficiently manage both the schedules easily with help of air travel. In addition, some of the business deals can be performed in the air-plane itself which save a lot of time and money.
To conclude, reducing flights in a year or stop taking flights completely depends on the requirement of an individual or a company. Nevertheless, the environment cannot be neglected, individuals can help the nature by taking decisions based on requirement and time.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument, discussing environmental impacts and business needs. However, the development is somewhat superficial. While you mention the environmental damage caused by greenhouse gases, the link to the 'disadvantages for individuals and businesses' is not fully explored beyond a single example of a CEO. The position is clear, but the argument lacks depth and nuance. To improve, you should provide more detailed reasoning on why the environmental benefits might or might not outweigh the economic costs, rather than simply listing the advantages of air travel for business.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence', 'For instance', and 'On the other hand' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'Eventually, they start to die'. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear; for example, the phrase 'on the same in the he has a meeting' contains a grammatical breakdown that disrupts the flow of the argument. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'upward trajectory', 'ecosystem', and 'extinction'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'life saver for them' (should be 'essential' or 'indispensable') and 'loss of capital of a business'. Some phrasing is also repetitive. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoid informal or imprecise expressions. Ensure that your word choices are consistently appropriate for a formal essay context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede clarity. For instance, 'entrepreneur's have business meeting' contains an incorrect apostrophe and a missing plural. The sentence 'on the same in the he has a meeting' is grammatically incoherent. There are also issues with article usage and subject-verb agreement throughout the text. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring that complex structures are formed correctly.
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