Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many persons make the decision to minimize the number of flights they take annually or completely shut out traveling by air. I firmly believe that fewer flights have a good impact on the atmosphere, and its good impact outweighs the loss of personnel and companies.

If fewer people use the planes to travel or they are completely reduced it to zero, it will definitely help the ecology to sustain back to its original condition. As it makes the atmosphere clean with less CO₂ emission, which can gives a chance of revival to upper atmosphere, the protector from sun. As the result, cleaner environment will lead to more better ecosystem for plants and animals by improving their habitat. In 2020, due to pandemic, lesser flights worldwide tried to resolve the global tension on climate action by 10%.

However, zero or less number of traveling to other places would affect companies and its chance for growth. Companies shares will be crashed and employees will loose their jobs, causing a catastrophic situation. If the global connection once damaged due to no flights from countries to countries, it would cause serious issues to diplomacy. For example, if a famine is broked out, it will need a solution by going there, and helping needy ones from richer countries, surely it can be done by traveling.

In conclusion, the reduction in number of journeys to foreign places will help to recover atmosphere. Despite of its clear advantages it will affect businesses and can cause serious damage to economy. My verdict is on conservation of environment is superior as it can give you a longterm living place on earth.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position that the environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages. The ideas are relevant, such as the mention of CO2 emissions and the economic impact on businesses. However, the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding diplomacy and famine is a bit underdeveloped and lacks a clear logical link to the frequency of air travel. While the position is consistent throughout, the supporting arguments could be more thoroughly explored to reach a higher band. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points, maintaining a clear stance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'However', 'For example', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or awkward, such as 'sustain back to its original condition' or 'If the global connection once damaged'. Referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be improved to sound more natural. The paragraphing is appropriate, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps the overall structure of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but lacks sophistication. There are several instances of imprecise word choice or awkward collocations, such as 'shut out traveling', 'sustain back', 'more better', and 'famine is broked out'. These errors do not impede communication, but they highlight a limited range of vocabulary. To improve, the student should focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoiding repetitive or informal phrasing. The attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'CO2 emission' and 'global tension' is positive, but more variety would be beneficial for a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('which can gives'), incorrect verb forms ('famine is broked out'), and awkward phrasing ('Companies shares will be crashed'). Punctuation is generally functional, but the frequency of errors is noticeable and occasionally distracts the reader. While the meaning is usually clear, the lack of control over complex structures prevents a higher score. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy and proofreading for common errors would significantly improve the quality of the writing.

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