Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Few individuals have decided to lack the number of fly in each year or to stop flying with each-other. Therefore, I firmly believe that the merits of this phenomenon outstrip it's demerits
On the one hand, there are multifarious benefits of not travelling by the airplane. this is mainly due to the fact that when more people are travels from one place to another it can cause the rush in any area whether it is in the airport or any specific countries for example delays flight and cancelling the flight can affect the overall environment of airport. Moreover, when the flight moving from one place to another it takes a large amount of fuels and it is the major concern about the environment as well as more fuels can create a air pollution.
In addition, there are more advantages of lack of numbers of flight. this is chiefly due to the fact that in some cases there are a several airlines has crashed due to unconditional weather forecast and it causes the loss of adults as a result families can suffers a lot. Furthermore, due to number of airline the air traffic control is busy sometimes in the bad weather nationally or internationally.
on the other hand, due to travelling some of major advantages. This is owing to the fact that some individuals experienced a fly high in the sky and the see the worlds from a bird-view. Another major concern sometimes the airport is fully rushed and most of the individuals in the que and it is exhausted.
To recapitulate, after scrutininzing the topic in its entirety it can be manifested that although reduced number of flying has own benefits of environmental development such low fuels in tyhe air
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to address the prompt but struggles with clarity and logical development. While you state a position, the arguments are often confusing or irrelevant. For instance, discussing 'airlines crashing' or 'airport rush' does not directly address the environmental benefits versus the disadvantages for businesses and individuals as requested. The essay is also incomplete, ending abruptly in the conclusion without finishing the final sentence. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a clear, relevant point that directly answers the prompt's core question regarding environmental benefits versus economic/personal disadvantages.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay uses basic cohesive devices like 'On the one hand' and 'In addition', but these are often used incorrectly or lead to disjointed ideas. Paragraphing is present, but the logical progression is weak. The final paragraph is incomplete, which disrupts the overall structure. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the use of 'this' without a clear antecedent. To improve, focus on using transition words that logically connect your ideas rather than just acting as labels, and ensure every paragraph has a clear topic sentence that links back to your main argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate. Phrases like 'lack the number of fly' and 'outstrip it's demerits' are unnatural and demonstrate a lack of control over collocation. There are frequent errors in word choice, such as 'loss of adults' instead of 'loss of life' and 'bird-view' instead of 'bird's-eye view'. While you attempt to use some academic-sounding words like 'multifarious' and 'scrutininzing', they are often used incorrectly or in contexts where they do not fit. Focus on learning common collocations and using simpler words accurately rather than attempting complex vocabulary that you are not yet comfortable with.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
Grammatical control is weak throughout the essay. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement ('airlines has crashed', 'families can suffers'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack proper syntax, making them difficult to follow. For example, 'when more people are travels' is grammatically incorrect. You rely heavily on simple structures, and your attempts at complex sentences often result in errors that impede meaning. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of verb tenses, before attempting more complex grammatical structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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