Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

These days some people seem to argue that travelling is most significant among individuals and businesses and it has not any kind of impact on environment. On the other hand, others are of the opinion that the numbers of planes fly cause damage environment in various ways. However, I agree to a great extent with the idea that flying numbers can effect people and businesses its disadvantages outweigh on environment benefits. There are certain reasons of my opinion which i wish to highlight in this essay.

In the first place, it would be quite interesting to note that businesses can effect because owners fly sometime for their business purposes and if they doesn't fly they loss their consumers. One illustration for this is that, it effects their revenue and they hardly bear their expenditures. Another major reason of this side of the topic seem to be that it causes to governments in several ways. Due to this government cannot be able to achieve their tax goals which they have been decided. For instance, if government not achieve their targets it fails to deliver basic amenities to people such as transport, health, education.

Yet there is dark side of the picture which advocates that, if people fly minimum times. it is beneficial for environment also because less air pollution spread and less diseases can harm people.

In conclusion, I am convinced to believe that it is indeed a debatable issue which need further analysis and discussions. However, in the light of above-discussed arguments disadvantages of people and business owners outweigh the advantages of environment in many aspects.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The essay addresses the prompt, but the position is somewhat contradictory and unclear. You state that you agree that the disadvantages of reducing flights outweigh the environmental benefits, yet your arguments regarding the negative impact on businesses and government tax goals are underdeveloped and lack logical depth. The environmental argument is mentioned only briefly in the third paragraph without sufficient elaboration. To improve, ensure that each body paragraph focuses on a single, well-supported idea that directly answers the 'do you think' aspect of the prompt. Currently, the reasoning is too general and lacks specific, convincing evidence to support your stance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive start. However, the logical progression between ideas is often weak. For example, the transition between the business argument and the government tax argument is abrupt. While you use some cohesive devices like 'In the first place' and 'In conclusion', they are sometimes used mechanically or incorrectly. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'another major reason of this side of the topic', which makes it difficult for the reader to follow your train of thought. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive. You rely on basic phrasing, such as 'effect people' (which should be 'affect') and 'dark side of the picture'. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'flying numbers' instead of 'the frequency of flights' and 'hardly bear their expenditures' which is not a standard collocation. To reach a higher band, you need to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary, including less common items and more precise collocations related to the topic of environment and economics. Focus on using words that accurately convey your intended meaning rather than relying on simple, sometimes misused, phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the essay that occasionally impede communication. You struggle with subject-verb agreement ('businesses can effect', 'if they doesn't fly', 'government not achieve') and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or contain awkward phrasing, such as 'it causes to governments in several ways'. While you attempt some complex structures, they are often inaccurate. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of modal verbs. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect verb forms will significantly improve the clarity of your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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