Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In todays modern world where everything is getting modernized day-by-day by the help of education. Some students go to abroad for studies while some go for finding job opportunities and their work and some travel by air for tourism purposes which increasing flights day-by-day. It is stated some people have to reduce the number of times they fly every year or two stop flying altogether. I will discuss everything related to this and then evaluate my conclusion.

On the one hand the people who travels alot during a year like 7-8 times to different countries and any other place individually is only for work purposes because that person is honourable in his company so company is sending that person to different countries as their representatives to promote their business and to expand them so if that person is flying many times what bad is that and why it should be reduced, when the source is increase and growing themselves and their workplaces. It is even beneficial for that person to grow fastly and even settle in any country abroad. And some families went abroad together for tourism is just to freshen their minds and learn new cultures, new environment.

However, it is even quite expensive to go abroad and flying many times taking plane fuel cost and when it departs from our country so many noise creates by number of planes, by these richest persons fares are even increasing which makes middle-class and lower-class people less compatible. On environment it impacts badly because everyone going to abroad for working purpose and tourism, no-one is coming to our country which makes our country less-developed.

I conclude that flying every year many times should not be reduced because the people who going for work purpose is not going happily far from his family, he only going for their family better future so we do not should have any concerns even he go every month because there should be many reasons for that and some families who going for picnic and tourism to abroad are going to get their family luxuries by visiting best countries to growth and by learning about new cultures, meet new people and new infrastructure.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the reasons why people fly frequently (for work and tourism) and the drawbacks associated with it, such as high costs, noise pollution, and environmental impacts. However, the position is not always clearly stated or maintained, and the ideas tend to wander into repetitive assertions rather than deep, structured development. For instance, the discussion on business travel relies on personal assertions like 'that person is honourable in his company' rather than robust, objective argumentation. Furthermore, the arguments concerning the environmental benefits requested by the prompt are only weakly addressed in a single, muddled paragraph that also touches on ticket prices and economic development. Overall, the task is addressed partially, corresponding to a Band 5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays some organizational structure with distinct paragraphs, but it lacks clear overall progression and logical flow. The introduction meanders through general statements about modernization and education before awkwardly attempting to paraphrase the prompt. Within the body paragraphs, sentences are often strung together with basic conjunctions or run-on structures without adequate cohesive devices. For example, sentences like 'On the one hand the people who travels alot during a year like 7-8 times to different countries and any other place individually is only for work purposes because that person is honourable in his company so company is sending that person...' are excessively long and syntactically tangled, making referencing confusing. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is faulty and repetitive, placing this performance at a Band 5.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with noticeable errors that occasionally impede understanding. Phrases like 'freshen their minds', 'fastly', and 'picnic and tourism' show a limited control of collocation and natural word choice. While the student attempts some less common terms like 'modernized', 'opportunities', and 'infrastructure', these are often used inaccurately or inappropriately in context (e.g., 'growth and by learning about new cultures, meet new people and new infrastructure'). Spelling and word-form errors are recurrent, such as 'todays' instead of 'today's' and 'going' instead of 'go'. The lexical range is minimally adequate for the task, matching the descriptors for Band 5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The grammatical structures employed are predominantly a mix of simple sentences and extremely long, convoluted complex sentences that lack proper punctuation and control. Many sentences contain multiple clauses linked incorrectly, leading to frequent grammatical errors such as subject-verb agreement issues ('people who travels', 'family better future') and tense shifts. For instance, 'we do not should have any concerns even he go every month' displays serious structural deficiencies. Punctuation is largely neglected, resulting in run-on sentences that require the reader to pause and decipher the meaning. Because the attempts at complex sentences are consistently faulty and frequent errors cause difficulty for the reader, a Band 5 is appropriate.

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