Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

It is often argued that it is crucial to teach childern about finance management, while a large proportion of people believe that it is too tough to understand on a early age, and it should be taught when they grew up. In my opinion, parents should teach their children how to save money and how important it is for their future lives.

On the one hand, people should explain their children from an early age why it is important to understant money management because at this period of time, they have sharp memory. They have ability to learn everthing at once, and their concentration power is also strong than a old person. To examplify, Rohan's father taught him how to calcuate the finances when he was in fiveth grade. He wanted a new tiffin box and a penicil box but his parents explain him that he already had a lunch box which was in good condition. So, rather than spending money on that he can save this amount for anything that he might needed in future, and till now he is using this trick, and he is the finance manager of his company.

On the other hand, some parents thinks that it is too hard for a child to learn about money management, because early age is the time when children enjoy their childhood with their families without any stress. So, it is better to teach the individuals how to manage money when they are older, because at this age, they are matured, and they have better understanding to learn the things. Moreover, youngsters are found of this type of studies which explains them to manage money, because they are more concerned about their futures.

To conclude, no doubt, money management is most significant thing in everyones' lives and we can not ignore it's advantages. But it is better to learn at early stage of life because at this age, everything seems easy to understand and children have more time to learn this.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 2.0

It is critical to note a severe issue regarding task relevance: the student has written an essay about teaching children finance management, which completely ignores the actual exam prompt concerning whether the environmental benefits of reducing air travel outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses. Consequently, the response is entirely off-topic for the provided prompt. According to the official IELTS band descriptors for Task Achievement, when a response is completely off-topic and fails to address the prompt, it must receive a Band 1 or Band 2. However, evaluating the internal structure and argumentation of the text provided, the writer does present a clear position and supports it with ideas and examples related to financial education. Due to the total failure to address the actual task prompt, a score of 2.0 is assigned.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The text demonstrates some basic organisational structure despite being completely off-topic for the prompt. The essay is divided into distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting opposing views, and a conclusion. The writer attempts to use logical connectors such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'To conclude' to signal transitions between ideas. However, paragraphing and referencing are sometimes awkward, and the overall progression is limited by mechanical transitions and repetitive sentence patterns. Cohesive devices are sometimes inaccurate or overused. When evaluated against the band descriptors, the essay shows a basic coherent arrangement that fits the criteria for Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The vocabulary used throughout the essay is basic, repetitive, and restricted. The writer frequently repeats fundamental terms such as 'finance management', 'children', and 'early age'. There are notable lexical and spelling errors, such as 'childern', 'understant', 'everthing', 'examplify', 'calcuate', 'fiveth', 'penicil', 'explain' (used instead of explained), 'matured', and 'fonged' (intended as 'fond'). While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the student's personal ideas about financial education, the noticeable errors and limited range place this criterion firmly within the Band 4.0 descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response contains a very limited range of grammatical structures, with frequent errors in both simple and complex sentences. Examples of grammatical inaccuracies include 'at a early age' instead of 'at an early age', 'when they grew up' instead of 'grow up', 'explain their children' instead of 'explain to their children', 'concentration power is also strong than a old person' instead of 'stronger than an older person', and 'parents thinks' instead of 'think'. Punctuation is also problematic, particularly in long, run-on sentences. These frequent errors often cause difficulty for the reader and distort meaning, aligning with the Band 4.0 descriptors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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