Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In this contemporary era, technology has been rising dramatically. Therefore, few individuals think that they should reduce the use of aeroplanes for travelling. The drawbacks of this development are overlapping the benefits which I will discuss in the enumerated paragraphs.
To commence with, there are enormous cons of reducing the number of flying on both people and businesses. First and formost is it affects the income generation of country which is generated through air industries. To explain it, if people less use of aeroplanes which they are considered more expansive, so people who do job in air companies will face a lot of issues in earning salaries. Another disadvantage is they are unable to meet their family, friend and relatives who live far away from them.To elaborate it, it will create disputes among them and it will week the strong relationships. Moreover, people who love to travel one country to another will face problem in enjoying their holidays so that they can fell relax from stressful job conditions.
On the other hand, reducing the number of flying will benefits environment at some aspect. Firstly, aeroplanes pollutes air the most as well as it produce noise pollution which is very difficult to bear. As a result, local people and flying animal will suffer a lot as they are harmed by these kind of machines. Secondly, there are various transports which are launched by governement in the recent year which are less expensive and environment friendly. People use them a lot to travel at longer distances.
In conclusion, economy of nation and salaries of people who do job in air companies will face many hurdles, whereas it is helpful in reducing pollution in the environment and promotes transports which do not need petrol and diesel to move.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response partially addresses the prompt by discussing both the drawbacks and benefits of reducing air travel, but the ideas remain limited and under-developed. While a position is stated in the introduction, it is somewhat mechanical and lacks strong elaboration. For instance, the discussion regarding the economic impact on the country and airline jobs is repetitive and supported by vague generalisations rather than specific examples. Similarly, the points about personal relationships and environmental aspects are introduced but lack deep exploration, meaning some parts of the prompt are treated superficially rather than fully developed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay displays an overall coherent arrangement with a clear attempt at logical progression through distinct paragraphs. The writer uses basic cohesive devices to structure the text, such as 'To commence with', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. However, some of these cohesive links feel somewhat mechanical or faulty, and referencing is not always entirely clear, as seen in phrases like 'Another disadvantage is they are unable...'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, but the flow between sentences within paragraphs could be smoother to achieve a higher level of cohesion.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, providing a limited range that allows the writer to communicate basic ideas. There are noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and word form throughout the essay, such as 'number of flying', 'First and formost', 'more expansive' instead of 'expensive', and 'flying animal'. While the writer attempts some less common vocabulary items, such as 'contemporary era' and 'generation of country', inaccuracies in word formation and spelling cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the lexical score from rising further.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The student demonstrates a limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on basic sentence forms with frequent attempts at complex sentences that are often faulty. There are frequent errors in grammar, including subject-verb agreement issues ('aeroplanes pollutes'), incorrect prepositions ('travel at longer distances'), article omission, and awkward phrase structures like 'if people less use of aeroplanes'. These frequent errors in grammar and punctuation can cause some difficulty and strain for the reader, characteristic of a response with basic grammatical control.
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