Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Several people are concerned about the yearly traval they do. They are planing to shorten the number of their flight or restricting traveling altogether. I strongly agree that the environmental advantages of this approach are of great importance and is crucial according to the need of modern world. There will be some problems for travelers and businesses, but the benefits it bringing on the board will outweigh the drawbacks.
One of the significant advantage is pollution control. Airplanes emit a large quantity of fumes while being operational. These fumes become the cause of many respiratory diseases. Additionaly, limiting the travel frequency can be helpful in fuel conservation. Airplanes utilize a vast quantity of fuel compared with cars or buses. The devolping countries with depleted fuel resources can take much advantage with concept.
On the other hand, businesses and frequent travelers can face a lot of issues like meetings. Mostly people visit to other persons just for a informal meeting like deal finalization or a negociation over a deal. With the advancement of technology, people can achieve this goal virtually by just arranging a video call or zoom meeting, where all board members can discuss and make alterations in their planning. There is no need to travel so frequently for simple tasks.
In conclusion, although businesses face some impacts like face to face meetings and deal confirmations, shortening your travels enhances air quality and assists in saving fuel especially for developing nations. I completely agree that this reduction brings several benefits and for the future, we can set a remarkable exemple for our younger generation to do the same.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the environmental benefits and the disadvantages for individuals and businesses, presenting a clear position throughout. The main ideas are generally relevant, but some are under-developed. For instance, the point about developing countries and fuel resources in the second paragraph is introduced but lacks sufficient explanation or specific examples. To reach a higher level, all core arguments need to be fully extended and supported with deeper analysis, avoiding any tendency to over-generalise.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear progression of ideas from the introduction through body paragraphs to a conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately to separate distinct arguments about pollution, fuel, and virtual meetings. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, with repetitive transitional phrases like 'On the other hand' and 'In conclusion'. Referencing is generally clear, but smoother and more varied cohesive devices would create a more natural flow and elevate the organization of the text.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The writer uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'operational', 'conservation', and 'alterations'. However, there are notable spelling and word-choice errors that detract from precision, such as 'traval' instead of 'travel', 'planing' instead of 'planning', 'Additionaly', and 'devolping'. Collocations are occasionally unnatural, such as 'bring on the board' instead of 'bring to the table' or 'bring', and 'informal meeting like deal finalization'. These lexical inaccuracies prevent the vocabulary from reaching a higher standard.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as conditional and concessive structures like 'although businesses face some impacts...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including subject-verb agreement issues like 'benefits it bringing' instead of 'benefits it brings', and awkward phrasing such as 'is crucial according to the need of modern world' missing an article. However, these errors rarely impede overall communication, and the meaning remains clear throughout the text.
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