Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In today's globalized world, travelling by air, has significantly reduced time and distance for long journeys. However, critics believe that flying by air is substantially contributing to pollution. Therefore, many people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly or to stop flying at all. Despite the fact that it could play an immense role in preserving environment, I concur with the notion that it's disadvantages outweighs it's advantages because many individuals, such as businessman, depend on travelling by air.
For most people time directly translates into money; therefore, entrepreneurs cannot stop using air transport because their work is dependent on travelling greater distances in lesser time. For business people it's a much more pragmatic approach to travel between countries within hours, allowing them to attend meetings and negotiate deals quickly. Furthermore, many countries are inaccessible without air travel because they are geographically isolated and cannot be reached easily by other means of transportations. For instance, if someone is travelling from America to Asia, flying by air is the only viable option.
On the contrary, proponents supporting the idea say that commercialization and ease of flying for every person is playing a salient role in air pollution. Global warming and gradual environment deteriotion is evident. Therefore, many people believe have decided to reduce the number of times they fly each year. It is true to some extent that the gases released from the planes while flying are causing the depletion of ozone-layer.
In a nutshell, while both viewpoints have their own merits. I firmly believe that stop flying altogether is not a pragmatic approach because flying by air reduces time and distance for long journeys.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the environmental benefits of reducing air travel and the disadvantages for individuals and businesses, fulfilling the baseline requirements of the prompt with 25 words copied directly from the task prompt. A clear position is stated in the introduction, where you concur with the notion that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. However, while relevant ideas are presented, some parts are more fully developed than others. For instance, the discussion around business needs and geographical isolation is supported with an example regarding travel from America to Asia, but the counter-argument regarding environmental deterioration lacks detailed extension and relies on repetition of the prompt. To reach a higher level, you would need to fully develop all parts of the argument with more comprehensive explanations and specific examples for both sides of the issue.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, demonstrating some organization of ideas. However, the progression of ideas is occasionally disrupted by mechanical or faulty cohesion. For example, transition phrases like 'On the contrary' are used somewhat awkwardly to introduce the opposing viewpoint, as it is not a direct contradiction of the preceding sentence about geographical isolation. Referencing and logical linking between sentences could be smoother to guide the reader effortlessly through the text. Paragraphing is used generally well to separate different arguments, but improving the flow and variety of cohesive devices would elevate the structural clarity of the essay.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, displaying a sufficient range to communicate ideas effectively. You make successful attempts at using less common lexical items such as 'globalized world', 'pragmatic approach', and 'geographically isolated'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word form, such as 'environment deteriotion' instead of 'environmental deterioration' or 'stop flying' where a gerund or different structure is required, like 'stopping flying altogether'. Despite these occasional errors and spelling slips, communication is not impeded, and the vocabulary remains generally clear and relevant to the topic.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating a willingness to construct varied sentences such as conditional or multi-clause structures. There are, however, several errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text. These include punctuation errors like the comma splice in 'travelling by air, has significantly reduced', as well as agreement and preposition issues, such as 'it's disadvantages outweighs it's advantages' where possessive and contraction forms are confused and subject-verb agreement fails. Fortunately, these errors rarely impede overall communication, but reducing their frequency and improving precision in complex structures will be necessary to achieve higher accuracy.
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