Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The global shift towards travelling by flights, accelerated by technological advancements and the workload, has fundamentally transformed the commuting industry. However, a considerable proportion of people have made a decision to travel less by plane or stop alying altogether. The essay will explore both the advantages and disadvantages before giving my opinion.
One of the major advantages of this development is the environmental benefits. It would be advantageous for ecosystem as well as reduce the air pollution. The air traffic and releasing smoke at the very height causes many environmental issues for human like damaging ozone layer which would make serious climate problems. The another benefit on nature is that it can save lives of predators like birds, numerous birds get hurt by the collison or radioactive waves near airports. Furthermore, this advancement can reduce the risk of life by accidents, plane-crashed incidents, and anxiety issues. Recently, There was a plane crashed on a college hostel in India due to technical glitch and unprofessionalism by pilots, as a result many lives were lost.
However, there are several disadvantages of this development. It would decline the employment opportunites, if number of flights were reduced due to boycott of some people. Numerous workers at airport and with airlines are dependent on the number of flights on daily bases and less number of pessengers can delay the flight until the plane is not full. Another loss is financial crisis, many airline industries earn great revenue from the tourism, and travelling; moreover, this also contribute in country's budget as taxation. For example, During the Covid pandemic, international and domestic flights were restricted globally and the flying industries lost alot that time.
In conclusion, while reducing the number of time people fly or stop travellin by airlines may have profound environmental advantages on air quality, reducing the risk of human and birds lives, it would definitely affect other people as well by declining the number of jobs, delays in flights, and economic loses. From my perspective, I believe the disadvantages of this development would outhweigh the advantages.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position throughout, concluding that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. The main ideas are relevant and cover both environmental benefits and socio-economic disadvantages. However, some ideas are under-developed or lack extension. For instance, the point regarding ecosystem benefits touches upon air pollution and ozone layer damage, but remains somewhat generalised. Similarly, the discussion on employment opportunities and financial crisis is introduced with broad statements rather than fully elaborated examples. To reach a higher band, the writer needs to extend these arguments with more specific, well-supported explanations rather than relying on brief assertions, showing a more thorough exploration of both sides of the issue.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from the introduction, through body paragraphs covering environmental advantages and disadvantages, to a final conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, with each main idea housed in its own distinct section. Cohesive devices are employed to link ideas, such as 'Furthermore', 'However', and 'In conclusion', though referencing and transitions can occasionally feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. For example, starting multiple sentences with structural connectors without fully integrated transitions makes the flow somewhat predictable. To achieve a higher level of cohesion, the writer should employ a wider variety of referencing and subtler transitional phrases that connect ideas more seamlessly across sentences.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'technological advancements', 'environmental benefits', and 'economic loses'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word formation that prevent the response from achieving a higher band score. Examples include 'travelling by flights' instead of air travel, 'releasing smoke at the very height', 'plane-crashed incidents', 'employment opportunites', 'daily bases', and 'pessengers'. Additionally, spelling slips like 'outhweigh' and 'loses' occur. While these lexical errors do not severely impede communication, they highlight a lack of precision and control over less common vocabulary items, pointing firmly towards the current band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at varied structures such as conditional and relative clauses. There are, however, some recurring errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text. These include article usage errors ('the commuting industry', 'the ecosystem', 'the another benefit'), prepositional mistakes ('dependent on the number of flights on daily bases'), and minor structural issues such as comma splices ('Recently, There was a plane crashed...'). Despite these lapses, the sentences are generally clear and the errors rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the writer's argument without excessive difficulty. To move up, the writer must demonstrate greater control over complex sentence patterns and reduce the frequency of basic grammatical slips.
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