Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

For the environmental benefits, some people have decreased using the mode of travelling by air or have stopped using it completely. I believe the harm and destruction it will cause to individuals and businesses outweigh the environmental benefits because for the individuals won't be able to travel at the speed compared to other available transport modes and businesses cannot expand at substantial rate as well.

It could be argued that travelling by air requires the consumption of petrol. The Petrol is obtained by converting fossil fuels through a mechanism. During this process, many chemicals and harmful substances are released into the environment in different forms. For example, harmful substance released through air can decrease the quality of air, or harmful waste discharged into the canals, river thus affecting the environment and indirectly have an impact on the quality of life as well.

However, I believe that people need to travel by air because they can reach any destination and far quickly than compared to other modes of travelling such as train. For example travelling through train on mountain area would require continuous tracks which requires substantial amount of labor and planning which can take a lot of years in time and even afterwards the time taken to travel between those two points will be greater whereas this problem doesn't exist at all for those who are travelling by air.

The businesses cannot expand at large rate and cannot operate in different remote areas if they don't use the air mode for transporting cargo. If businesses do not expand then it will not create more opportunities in forms of job for individuals and they will not bring more revenue thus having low impact on the economy as well.

In Conclusion, I believe that reducing the use of flying mode of travel doesn't help much in benefits of environment and causes more negative effects to individuals and businesses trying to travel from one place to another or businesses trying to expand in different areas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you argue that the disadvantages for individuals and businesses outweigh the environmental benefits. You address both sides by acknowledging pollution from fuel use, then discussing travel speed and business expansion. These are relevant points, and the examples about rail construction in mountainous areas and transporting cargo help illustrate them. However, the environmental case is only briefly developed, and the claim that flying less “doesn't help much” is not supported with evidence or explanation. Some arguments are also broad: for instance, you assert that businesses cannot expand or operate in remote areas without air transport, without considering alternatives or qualifying the claim. Develop the environmental benefits and make the comparison between the two sides more explicit to strengthen your response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph acknowledging environmental harm, two paragraphs presenting disadvantages, and a conclusion. The contrast signalled by “However” is useful, and the main position remains consistent. At times, though, progression is less smooth because the first body paragraph discusses pollution without clearly linking it to the question of whether the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. Some connections are also repetitive or imprecise, such as repeated use of “whereas” and “thus,” while the long sentence about rail travel combines several points. Use clearer topic sentences and divide complex explanations into shorter units. More precise referencing would also help readers follow phrases such as “this problem” and “those two points.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “fossil fuels,” “harmful substances,” “remote areas,” “cargo,” and “revenue.” There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “substantial amount of labor and planning.” However, several expressions are awkward or imprecise, which limits clarity and naturalness: “decreased using the mode of travelling by air,” “far quickly,” and “expand at large rate.” Repetition of “travel,” “businesses,” and “environment” also narrows the range. Aim for accurate collocations and more concise phrasing—for example, describe people as reducing air travel, and compare journey times directly. Check word forms and capitalization too, as in “petrol” after the sentence opening.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “whereas,” and “if.” Most of the argument remains understandable, but some grammatical errors make sentences awkward or difficult to follow. For example, “because for the individuals won't be able to travel” has an incomplete structure, and “which requires substantial amount of labor and planning which can take a lot of years” contains unclear clause attachment and article use. In “harmful waste discharged into the canals, river thus affecting,” the sentence lacks a clear finite verb and has punctuation problems. Practise building complete clauses and controlling long sentences, especially with relative clauses. More accurate articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries would make your ideas easier to read.

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