Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's rapidly evolving world, domestic tourism has been a prevalent phenomenon, raising the concerns for multinational businesses across the world. While a substantial number of individuals have decided to stop flying or reduce the number of flight, I ardently assert that the drawabaks of this development can far outweigh the advantages, though my reason will be provided in the coming pragraphs.

To begin with, propoenents emphasize that if people not chose international flights, they can deliberately mitigate the issue of environmental degradation. This is because, airways and airoplanes require significant amount of fossil fuels including coal, petrol, ethonol and diesel, which release the green gases into the atmophere, and they contaminate the natural environment. This approach can be advantageous to both reduction in non-renewable resources and the ecosystem. Consequently, this is a viable solution that improve air quality, so improved air quality can not only diminish the amount of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere but also reduce the respiratory deseases and lifestyle-related illnesses for humans, who suffer from ailments on account of contaminated air. For instance, according to report of the organisation called World Health Ministry (WHM), the ratio of clean natural atmosphere in Sweden is more that 75% since authorities encourage citizens to avoid air flight and adopt public railways.

However, despite the given argument, a significant proportion of the inhabitants across the world argue that this phenomenon could have deleterious ramifications for international companies and travellers. Due to the fact that a considerable number of local enterprises including hotels, international museums restaurants and souvenires shop often rely on foreign exchange economy, which could stenghten their economic productivity. As a consequence, they may suffer from loss and eventully they have to wind up their businesses. Furthermore, tourists cannot get sufficient opportunity to travel across the borders, which could reduce their chances to get knowledge of other countries' culture and heritage. To elaborate, when individuals tavel from on nation to another, they can foster social cohesion and dismental prejudice, discrimination and resentments. Hence, international travel can be indispensable the nations' social and economoic prosperity.

In conclusion, although deterring humans to aopt international flights have myriad benefits, this could affect advesely to the nations' social and economic progress. Hence, travellers should aopt fights whenever they need, provided that they could eliminate the excessive usage without any fundamental requirement

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and state a position: you argue that the disadvantages can outweigh the environmental benefits, then conclude that people should avoid unnecessary flights rather than stop flying altogether. The environmental case is relevant, linking fewer flights with lower fossil-fuel use and cleaner air, while the business and cultural effects provide a counterargument. However, the position is not fully consistent: the opening says the drawbacks “can far outweigh” the advantages, but the conclusion mainly recommends moderation without clearly weighing the two sides. Some support is also under-developed, especially the Sweden example, whose statistic is not clearly connected to reduced flying. Make the comparison explicit and explain how the benefits and costs balance overall.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the environmental and economic/social arguments, and a conclusion. Sequencing is generally easy to follow, and signposts such as “To begin with,” “However,” and “In conclusion” help identify the stages of the argument. Cohesion is sometimes mechanical, though, and several links repeat or overstate cause and effect: “Consequently” and “As a consequence” introduce results without always making the reasoning precise. Some references are also unclear, such as “This approach” and “this phenomenon,” which could refer to several ideas. Improve progression by linking each example directly to the claim it supports and using clearer references rather than relying mainly on formulaic transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a broad range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “environmental degradation,” “non-renewable resources,” “deleterious ramifications,” and “social cohesion.” These choices show ambition, but inaccurate spelling and word choice are frequent enough to reduce precision: examples include “drawabaks,” “propoenents,” “ethonol,” “atmophere,” and “dismental.” Some collocations are also unnatural, such as “the ratio of clean natural atmosphere” and “wind up their businesses” in this context. Prefer accurate, natural phrasing over unusually formal words, and check spelling carefully. For instance, “air travel” is more appropriate than “airways” when discussing passenger flights, and “greenhouse gases” is the standard term for gases that trap heat.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional and relative clauses, as in “if people not chose international flights” and “humans, who suffer from ailments.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity. Examples include “if people not chose,” which needs an auxiliary (“if people do not choose”), “a significant amount of fossil fuels,” where the quantifier should agree with the plural noun, and “a viable solution that improve,” which requires “improves.” There are also problems with articles and sentence construction, such as “according to report” and the fragment-like opening of the business explanation after “Due to the fact that.” Review subject–verb agreement, articles, and complete clause structure, then proofread complex sentences for accuracy.

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