Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Carbon emissions produced by air travel are no doubt are making the climate worse. But, in my opinion, not taking the flight does not help the environment in any way. But doing so is just going to make indivisuals and companies to lose their businesses and it will put a breakthrough in economies globally.

Companies function on the model of capturing the market, but if the representative of a company that is suppose to negotiate with their vendor in another coountry will take weeks to reach, the vendor might end up signing the deal with their competitor who flew by plane and reached them earlier. It will just hinder the ability for a business to go successful, and go obsolete within days, as reaching to places on time is one of the derivative of success for them. Choosing to care about environment might signal the market about their sustainable practices, but it will be of no use, if they would be out of market.

Ever since the plane was invented, they have played an important part in globalising the world. Some of the countries in the world are run merely by tourism, and it would become harder for their economies to sustain if their tourists will be stranded in the sea to reach them. National airlines are considered to be the flag carriers of the countries, that bring businessmen to the country where they sign deals worth millions.

To conclude, In my affirm opinion choosing not to travel by air just not outweighs the the drawbacks for the indivisuals and businesses. Travelling by air is just a need of the hour.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you argue that the disadvantages of reducing air travel outweigh the environmental benefits. You address impacts on businesses, tourism-dependent countries and national airlines, and the examples about a delayed business representative and tourists travelling to island destinations are relevant to the question. However, the environmental side is not examined in enough detail to make the comparison convincing. The claim that avoiding flights “does not help the environment in any way” is asserted rather than supported, and the essay does not weigh possible emissions reductions against the economic costs. Some points, such as airlines bringing businessmen to sign deals, repeat the business argument rather than extending it. Develop both sides with specific reasoning and evidence.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present economic arguments, and a conclusion restates your position. The business example follows logically from the point about international negotiations, and the tourism paragraph adds a related consequence. However, the progression is somewhat repetitive because both body paragraphs focus on economic dependence, while the environmental benefit receives little development. Some connections are awkward or unclear, such as “But doing so” after the opening contrast, and “To conclude” introduces a conclusion that largely repeats the introduction. Use clearer links to show comparison and cause and effect, and organise the body around distinct arguments, including a developed environmental counterpoint.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “carbon emissions,” “sustainable practices,” “globalising,” and “flag carriers,” which helps communicate the subject. However, the range and control are limited by several inaccurate or unnatural choices. “Put a breakthrough in economies” does not express the intended negative effect; “disrupt economies” would be clearer. “Go successful,” “derivative of success,” and “affirm opinion” are also unnatural collocations, while “indivisuals” and “coountry” are misspelled. These choices sometimes make the reader pause to interpret your meaning. Build a bank of accurate phrases for economic impacts and environmental trade-offs, and check spelling and collocations during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if the representative … will take weeks to reach” and a relative clause beginning “who flew by plane.” This shows an effort to express cause and consequence, but some sentence patterns are not controlled accurately. The opening has a repeated verb construction in “are no doubt are making”; “a representative … that is suppose to negotiate” has agreement and verb-form problems; and “if they would be out of market” uses an unsuitable conditional form. There are also article and plural issues, as in “the plane was invented, they have played.” Review conditional forms, subject–verb agreement, and sentence punctuation, then proofread each clause for a complete, grammatically consistent structure.

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