Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

It is widely believed that people readuce the number of times they fly every year and they shoud stop flying altogether has both advantages and disadvantages. While there are some negative aspects, Iam convinced that advantages outweigh the disadv antages.

One of the most natable benefits is that the air pollution become a lase and fuel will allso do not burn so we can save a environment. To exempilfy, the ari pollution can save and make anvarment fresh we can save a people life. As a result when people have a problem to take OXYGEN it can sole in few proportion.

Moreover, there are so maney transport are avelable in our life but flying altogether can not stop becouse there are maney things are transported in other country it become very costliey and it is not a safe for some product. For instance, when two country are giving some product to each auther and it is very expensive and it do not get a demage so we have to take a very carefull ot bring in to a aeroplanes. As a result goverment do not spand more money in this and they do more work in there country by using

In conclusion, although people do not travle more in to the flying altogether is a seriovs concern, it can be effectively addressed through practical measures, and if implemented properly it is likely bring long-term improvements in other transpotetion and save a people life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a position—that the benefits outweigh the disadvantages—and identify reduced pollution as a benefit and effects on transporting goods as a disadvantage. However, the response only minimally addresses the comparison in the question: the environmental benefit is asserted rather than explained, while the discussion of businesses and individuals is unclear and unfinished. For example, “we can save a environment” does not explain how reduced flying would help, and the goods example does not clearly establish the scale of the disadvantage or weigh it against the benefit. The conclusion introduces “practical measures” and improvements in other transport without developing these points earlier. The response is 235 words, 15 words below the 250-word minimum; eight words copied from the prompt were not counted. Develop relevant reasons and examples for both sides, then make the comparison explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposts such as “Moreover,” “For instance,” and “In conclusion” help show the intended structure. However, progression within paragraphs is difficult to follow because several ideas are joined without clear logical links. In the second body paragraph, the shift from alternative transport to the cost and safety of products is not fully explained, and the final sentence breaks off at “by using.” The first body paragraph also repeats the pollution point rather than extending it. To improve, give each paragraph one clear main idea, arrange its explanation and example in sequence, and use linking phrases only where the relationship between ideas is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “air pollution,” “fuel,” “transport,” and “expensive,” so the reader can identify the general subject. However, the range is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling errors and inaccurate word choices strain understanding. Examples include “readuce,” “natable,” “anvarment,” and “transpotetion”; phrases such as “the air pollution can save” and “take OXYGEN” do not express the intended meaning naturally. Some wording is also too vague, such as “some product” and “do more work.” Build a small bank of accurate topic vocabulary and check spelling, word forms, and collocations. More precise expressions for emissions, alternative travel, and freight would help communicate your ideas clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some longer sentence forms, including a contrast in the introduction (“While there are some negative aspects…”) and a conditional structure in the conclusion (“if implemented properly…”). However, the range is very limited in practice, and frequent errors in sentence construction, verb forms, agreement, and articles sometimes distort meaning. For example, “the air pollution become a lase” has an incorrect verb form and unclear structure, while “there are so maney transport are avelable” combines clauses incorrectly. “It is likely bring” is missing a grammatical element, and several sentences lack clear boundaries or complete endings. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then connect them with subordinate clauses; check subject–verb agreement, articles, and complete sentence structure.

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