Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

In morden arc peoples have decided to reduce the number of times to touch the fly every year or to stop flying altogether. It has more advantages rather then disadvantages on the bases of to be strong and cerative.

To begin with, there are so many benefits rather then drawbacks for indiviuals and businesses. To explain it, we are welkown about the peoples and businesses sectors they see the profits beacause they want to stand in the businesses sector. As the result, they used more advace tecnology which is eco-friendly it is also benefits the people and enviroments and they grew and become the strong eoung to protect the empire. Similarly, if the competion will be high then people and businesses will created the alternatives ways to fly in the sky.

On the other hands, some people think that it has disadvantages rather then advantages. To elaborate, if numbers of fly will reduce then people cannot able to feel feeling of freedom, when you and your family is fly to it fells you achive the remaing pice of your life which is improtant for the bussines and for individuals.

To sum up, If the people cannot fly then slowly they forget to fly with free well. It is improtant for enviroment to crated new ideas and items which is eco-firendly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You give a general position that reducing flights has more advantages, and you include a paragraph about possible disadvantages. However, the environmental benefits are not clearly explained, and the advantages for individuals and businesses are mostly asserted rather than supported. For example, the claim that businesses will use “eco-friendly” technology does not explain how fewer flights produce environmental gains or what costs businesses might face. The point about losing a feeling of freedom is relevant but needs a concrete explanation or example. The response is also below the required 250 words: 204 words, with 16 words copied from the prompt excluded. Develop both sides with specific reasons and examples, then make the comparison explicit in your conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting contrasting views, and a conclusion. Linking phrases such as “To begin with,” “On the other hands,” and “To sum up” help signal these stages. However, the progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because ideas are loosely connected. For instance, the move from businesses seeking profits to using advanced technology and then protecting an “empire” does not form a clear chain of reasoning. Some references, such as “it” and “they,” are also unclear. Organise each paragraph around one main point, explain it step by step, and use linking expressions only where they accurately show the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

You attempt vocabulary related to the topic, including “environment,” “eco-friendly,” “businesses,” and “alternatives,” and you try to express abstract ideas such as freedom and competition. However, the range is basic and many word-choice, spelling, and collocation errors make meaning difficult to understand. Examples include “touch the fly,” “on the bases of,” “advace tecnology,” and “created the alternatives ways.” Some expressions, such as “protect the empire,” are unclear in this context. Build a more accurate set of topic phrases and check spelling and word forms. Prefer precise expressions such as “reduce air travel,” “lower carbon emissions,” and “alternative forms of transport” to make your argument clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You use both simple statements and attempts at longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “if” and “when.” This shows some effort to vary sentence structure. However, control is inconsistent, particularly in conditional forms, verb agreement, and sentence construction. For example, “if the competion will be high then people and businesses will created” combines verb forms incorrectly, while “people cannot able to feel” uses an unnecessary auxiliary. In “when you and your family is fly,” the subject and verb do not agree, and the sentence structure is incomplete. Practise forming accurate conditional sentences and check that each sentence has a clear subject and correctly formed verb. More reliable sentence patterns will help readers follow your ideas.

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