Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In today's rapidly evolving worlds, few individuals have decided to reduce the large amount of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether has spearked considerable debate.Although this development has some disadvantages for individuals and businesses,there are some benefits of this development.In the following paragraph,I will present my viewpoints, supported by logical reasoning and personal experience.

On the one hand,one of the main benfits of this development is that individuals decrease the millions of times fly they can save money and time beacuse for traveling may spend good amount of money on tickets, hotels and food.For example,if a person when travel form one country to another country , he dedicate his time and money on traveling.Furthermore, its possitive implications can be observed in our life.At the end of the day I strongly agree with this statement,Besides that thare are more and more benefits of this trend.

On the other hand, there are few drawbacks of this trend which is one of main reason is that people cannot fly properly they cannot progress in others countries and a lot of folks may not soical connection with foreign people.For instance, if a person cannot travel other countries,he may not learn many things about his bussinesses life,communication and never build confidents that way it is neccessary for every citizent but beyong the limits.

In conclusion,i firmly support the idea of people have decided to reduce the many of times they fly in every year they should be less traveling from one county to another country.In the future,its advantages will become even more pronounced.If applied wisely,it holds the potential to contribute to societal progress.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You give a position that supports reducing air travel, and you mention both environmental benefits and disadvantages for individuals. However, the response only partially addresses the question: the environmental benefits are not explained, and the discussion focuses instead on saving money and time. The business impact is also largely missing, while claims such as people being unable to “progress in others countries” are unclear and not developed with relevant support. The introduction and conclusion repeat your general view, but the reasons in the body do not establish whether environmental gains outweigh the costs. To strengthen the response, explain how fewer flights could reduce emissions, then compare that benefit with specific effects on business travel, trade, or employment, supported by clear examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, and the contrastive openings “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help signal a basic structure. However, there is no clear progression from the points to a reasoned comparison of benefits and disadvantages. Several linking expressions are repetitive or do not connect ideas logically, such as “Furthermore” followed by a vague statement and “At the end of the day” before another unsupported claim. Some sentences run together, and references such as “this development” and “that way” are not always clear. Organise each body paragraph around one main point, explain it, and use linking phrases only where they show a genuine relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt some topic-related vocabulary, including “environmental benefits,” “drawbacks,” “communication,” and “societal progress,” so the reader can identify the general subject. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make meaning difficult to follow: “large amount of times,” “millions of times fly,” and “progress in others countries” are not natural expressions. Spelling errors such as “spearked,” “benfits,” “soical,” and “neccessary” are also noticeable. Aim for accurate, straightforward phrases before trying more elaborate wording. For example, use “reduce the number of flights,” “international business opportunities,” and “build relationships with people abroad,” and check spelling carefully during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a concession in the opening and conditional structures such as “if a person cannot travel.” However, control is weak: many sentences contain errors that obscure the intended meaning. For example, “individuals decrease the millions of times fly they can save money” has an unclear clause structure, while “one of main reason is” has problems with articles and agreement. There are also inconsistent sentence boundaries and punctuation, as in “debate.Although” and “In conclusion,i.” Build shorter, complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses with clear subjects and verbs. Check agreement, articles, and punctuation, and read each sentence aloud to identify where its meaning breaks down.

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