Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people around the globe prefer to travel with aeroplane to cover longer distance in shorter time period, altough few avoid flying due the effects causing on environment. I believe the natural benifits outweigh the disadvantage benifits for individuals and organasations. Reducing number of flights contribute to reduce the air pollution also reduce the uses of fossil fuel. However, this might create some issues for business and individuals.

To begin with, flights contibutes more into air pollutions than motor bikes. However, an aeroplane consumes almost ine third amount of fuel to take off from runway, this causes excess use of fossil fuels. Additionally recent studies showed ozone layer becomming thinner becasue of increased air pollution. Similarly, areplane fly at higher attitude, this creates higher chances of spreading pollution directly into atmosphere. Addition to this, few studies proved noises created by the areoplanes are the second main cause of noise pollution.

Consequently, reducing the number of flight impacted the businesses and many people. Individuals often choose to travel to areoplane because of convinence and relaibility. Where businesses use cargo plane to transport the goods from one to another continent, which eventually lead to increase in number of flights. Recent news in an international newpaper claimed that cargo ships are more likely to transport goods rather than aeroplanes, dispite it is an time consuming process but still a better option for sustainble develpoment.

In conclusion, I believe that, reducing the number of flights help to reduce the air pollution along help to reduce the use of fossil fuels. Whereas, few businesses might get affected but other sustainble options are presen to move good.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you believe the environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages, and you address effects on both the environment and people or businesses. You give relevant points about fuel use, pollution, convenience and cargo transport. However, some ideas are not fully explained or are difficult to assess, such as the claim that aircraft use “almost one third” of fuel during take-off and the comparison with motorbikes. The discussion of noise pollution is also not clearly connected to reducing flights. Your point about cargo ships being a more sustainable alternative is relevant, but would be stronger with a specific example and a clearer explanation of how this balances the disadvantages. Develop these points more precisely to make the argument more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for environmental effects and disadvantages, and a conclusion that restates your view. This gives the reader an overall logical route through the argument. You also use linking expressions such as “To begin with,” “Additionally,” and “Consequently.” At times, however, connections between ideas are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Similarly” introduces a point about aircraft altitude without showing how it relates to the previous claim, while “Consequently” begins a paragraph about disadvantages without clearly signalling the shift. Some references, such as “this” in “this creates higher chances,” are not precise. Use transitions that express the exact relationship and organise each paragraph around a clearly developed main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “fossil fuels,” “air pollution,” “cargo plane,” and “sustainable development,” so the reader can generally understand your main ideas. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “altough,” “benifits,” “organasations,” and “convinence.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “travel with aeroplane,” “air pollutions,” and “move good.” These errors sometimes make the intended meaning less clear and limit precision. Build a bank of accurate topic collocations and check spelling carefully. Prefer established expressions such as “travel by plane,” “reduce emissions,” and “transport goods,” and use them consistently rather than relying on awkward or repeated phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple statements and some attempts at more complex structures, including “Where businesses use cargo plane to transport the goods…” and “despite it is an time consuming process.” This shows an effort to vary sentence forms, but several structures are incomplete or inaccurate. “Reducing number of flights contribute” needs a determiner and subject–verb agreement, while “Individuals often choose to travel to aeroplane” has an incorrect grammatical pattern. The sentence beginning “Where businesses use…” is a fragment, and the final sentence joins ideas awkwardly. Articles, plurals, verb forms and sentence boundaries need more consistent control. Practise building complete sentences with one clear main clause, then add subordinate clauses only when their grammatical relationship is secure.

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