Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.
Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Many people tend to reduce the travel by air because they believe it will benefit the environment. This topic has become a growing concern now but I firmly believe that the disadvantages will outweigh the benefits because majority of the people use air travel for work like business, seminars, and conferences. it is also used for global tourism.
While many people argue that reducing travel through aeroplane will be beneficial for environment but I strongly disagree with this statement. I believe that people use this type of transport for necessary purposes like work, business etc. Although, it can cause air pollution but it can't be reduced or stop. This type of transport has great impact on world's economy. For instance, I am planning to visit South Korea for masters in 2027, in this case, travel by air is the only option that left for me.
One of the other reasons is that, people use aeroplanes for abroad tourism. Individuals from around the world visit different countries to see and witness the unique traditions of particular country. They also visit to beautiful spots of different nations which leads to the better economy of that country. It also helps to relieve stress caused by hectic jobs. For example, many people around the world visit to Switzerland and that's the reason, over 60% of Switzerland economy belongs to the tourism.
To conclude this essay, I firmly believe that reducing transport by air can contribute to better environment but the disadvantages easily outweigh its benefits because It contributes massively to worlds economy.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your position is clear: you argue that the disadvantages of reducing air travel outweigh the environmental benefits. You address both work-related travel and tourism, and the examples of your planned study in South Korea and tourism in Switzerland make the discussion relevant. However, the environmental side is only briefly acknowledged, and the claim that air pollution “can't be reduced or stop” is not explained or supported. Some points are also asserted rather than developed: for example, the economic importance of tourism does not by itself show that fewer flights would cause greater overall harm than the environmental benefits. To strengthen the response, compare the scale of these effects and explain more fully how businesses and individuals would be affected.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the main position is easy to follow. The paragraphs also group related ideas: employment and the economy are discussed first, followed by tourism. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, particularly through repeated openings such as “One of the other reasons” and “For example.” The contrast in the second paragraph is also awkwardly signalled by “While … but,” which makes the relationship between ideas less clear. Some references, such as “It” in the tourism paragraph, could be more precise. Use a wider range of linking methods and make each paragraph develop one central claim step by step.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including topic-related terms such as “air pollution,” “global tourism,” “world's economy” and “unique traditions.” There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “hectic jobs” and “contribute massively.” However, several word choices and collocations are unnatural or imprecise, including “reduce the travel by air,” “travel through aeroplane,” “visit to beautiful spots” and “the only option that left for me.” Repetition of “use,” “visit” and “economy” also limits flexibility. Aim to learn common word partnerships and choose precise expressions; this will make your argument sound more natural without changing its meaning.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “because,” “although” and “which,” and the overall meaning is generally clear. Some grammatical errors remain, however. For example, “because majority of the people” needs an article, and “Although, it can cause air pollution but…” combines two contrasting structures incorrectly. In “the only option that left for me,” the verb form is incomplete; “the only option left for me” would be grammatical. There are also punctuation and capitalisation slips, such as starting “it” after a full stop and capitalising “It” mid-sentence in the conclusion. Review articles, clause structure and sentence boundaries, while continuing to practise complex sentences.
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