Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this modern era, people fly to spend their quality time exploring the world, and might others fly for businesses and educational purposes.Recently,some people have decided that they should reduce time they take journey on planes each year or they want to stop flying with others. This will be very beneficial for environment and it will also have few disadvantages for businesses and people, who want to take long trips all around the world.

On the one hand, some people want to cut down the frequency of flying to other area or country. It will have many advantages on environment, as it helps to clean the environment and atmosphere because reducing the tours on plan will also decrease the pollution in air through airplanes engine. It also helps birds to take locomotion freely becuase when signals of aeroplane diminish navigation, it will highly improve birds signals from their nest to them. For instance, in 2015, South Korea government noticed that their birds were reducing day by day, for more reason that it was cutting the message from their homes, so government stop the flights for six months and as they expected birds came back. And also atmosphere becomes very natural with no harms.

On the other hand, minimizing flight will also disturbs whole businesses, because it will not take others to their destination for buisness and work purpose. However, it will also very beneficial for own country, because you had went to other countries for businesses and you were giving benifits to that specific country, but when this will cut off, you start businessses in your own country which will help to increase economic state of your country.

Finally, it's advantages will outweigh the disadvantages, as it has more advantages than disadvantages. It will be a dispute between two parties, first having interest to explore the world and other with idea to increase the economy of their own country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall view that the environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages, and you address both environmental effects and consequences for businesses and individuals. The discussion of reduced aircraft pollution is relevant, while the business paragraph recognises disruption but also suggests that domestic business could grow. However, several points are unclear or insufficiently supported. The claim that flights disrupt birds’ navigation, and the specific South Korean example, are difficult to follow and are not explained convincingly. The disadvantages for individuals, such as reduced access to travel or family visits, receive little attention. To strengthen the response, develop a more credible example and explain more directly why the environmental gains outweigh the practical and economic costs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The signposts “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “Finally” help readers identify the stages of the argument, and the overall position is consistent. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow. In the environmental paragraph, the discussion moves from air pollution to bird navigation and then to a government example without clear links. The business paragraph also shifts quickly from disruption to benefits for the home economy. Some connections, such as “And also,” feel mechanical, and references such as “this” and “it” are not always clear. Use topic sentences and explicit cause-and-effect links to make each paragraph’s reasoning easier to track.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “pollution,” “atmosphere,” “frequency,” and “economic state,” and you use some variety rather than relying entirely on basic words. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making ideas hard to understand. For example, “take locomotion freely” does not naturally express the idea of birds moving or navigating, and “cutting the message from their homes” is unclear. There are also spelling errors such as “becuase,” “buisness,” and “benifits.” Aim to learn common topic collocations and check spelling; precise, natural phrasing will make your argument more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses with “because” and “when,” but control is inconsistent, especially in complex sentences. Errors in verb forms and agreement appear in examples such as “minimizing flight will also disturbs” and “government stop the flights.” Other problems include “people, who want” (unnecessary comma) and the unclear construction “you had went to other countries.” Sentence boundaries and spacing also need attention, as in “purposes.Recently,some.” These errors sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Practise forming accurate clauses with consistent subjects and verb tenses, and proofread punctuation and sentence boundaries. More reliable control of these patterns would allow your ideas to come across clearly.

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