Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years some people have decided to reduce the number of times they travel by air or to stop flying completely. Although this decision may create some difficulties for individuals and buisnesses, I believe that the environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages.

On the one hand, people perfer to travel by air in planes and this planes release harmul gases like CO2 in a larger amount which is causing serious problems. This released harmful substance react with rain and become acidic rain which causes varios problems for aquatic animals. This is because the acidic rain goes down into rivers and oceans and make survival difficult for marine life because they cannot survive in acidic water. In addition, the carbon dioxide also causes depletion in ozone layer and makes holes in it which allows Uv rays to reach earth and affect skin. This Uv rays are very harmful for helath , it causes skin issues like skin cancer. Environmental protection is very significant than businesses and economy.

On the other hand, reducing air travel can aslo create difficulties for individuals and businesses. This is because many people want to attend business meetings and meet with clients and owners. It can also create problems of students going to abroad because they want to pursue higher education abroad and air travel is very convenient for long jouneys. I belive that this issues can be easily solve by taking some steps like business man should arrange meetings by using technology and students should go abroad by cruise ship.

In conclusion, reducing air travel will create some difficulties but that can easily be solved with the help of technology, however i believes that environmental protection is more important.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction and conclusion: you believe the environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages. You address both sides, giving relevant examples such as harm to marine life and the difficulty of attending business meetings or studying abroad. However, the environmental explanation is not always accurate or clearly connected to flying: the claims that carbon dioxide causes acid rain and ozone depletion weaken the support for your main argument. The disadvantages are also less fully explored; for example, you mention meetings and overseas study but do not explain the wider effects on businesses or individuals. Develop fewer points with accurate evidence and explain more directly why the benefits outweigh the costs. The response meets the task length requirement; 11 words copied from the prompt were excluded from the count.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two sides, and a conclusion. The contrast between “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” helps readers follow the argument, and the conclusion returns to your position. Within the first body paragraph, however, the sequence from carbon dioxide to acid rain, marine life, ozone depletion, and skin cancer feels like a chain of claims rather than a carefully developed argument. Some references are also unclear, as in “This released harmful substance” and “This UV rays.” Use clearer links between cause and effect, and make pronoun references precise. A more deliberate progression from each main point to its explanation and relevance to your position would make the essay easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate your main ideas, including “environmental protection,” “marine life,” “business meetings,” and “higher education.” There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “depletion in ozone layer.” However, spelling errors and inaccurate word choices are noticeable, including “buisnesses,” “perfer,” “harmul,” and “varios.” Some phrases are awkward or imprecise, such as “travel by air in planes,” “released harmful substance,” and “go abroad by cruise ship.” These choices sometimes make the argument less clear, even though the general meaning can usually be understood. Check spelling carefully and learn natural collocations for discussing emissions, environmental effects, and alternative travel or communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession in the introduction (“Although this decision may create…”) and a reason clause beginning “This is because.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main message remains understandable. However, errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction occur across the essay. For example, “This released harmful substance react” has a singular subject with a plural verb, while “this issues can be easily solve” has problems with both number and verb form. The sentence “This UV rays are very harmful for health, it causes…” also joins clauses incorrectly and shifts agreement. Review subject–verb agreement, singular and plural forms, and sentence boundaries, then proofread each sentence for a complete and consistent grammatical structure.

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