Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Several people have decided to lessen the number of times they travel by planes each year or rather just stop taking flights and take a alternative method for travelling around for business trips.

In this rapidly evolving world the issue of choosing between environmental benefits and individuals choice of travelling by air has become a matter of considerable interest prompting widespread debate regarding its impact on individuals and society, while some people firmly believe that environment comes first before anything whereas others argue that every person should have their own freedom of choice. I personally believe that we have to preserve our environmet first of all and it should be our utmost priority.

The enviromental benefits of this initiative will only outweigh the drawbacks for individuals and businesses under the condition that it is adopted on a massive scale and to start a principal which everybody has to follow and it is non-negotiable however if somebody declines and refuses to accept this approach of creating society a better place, they should be charged with a heavy penalty which would be used for the betterment of our environment.

Now, if this idea is embraced on a rapid extent then this will help diminish the overall air pollution created by aircrafts over the years which as a result will make our environment cleaner than before helping individuals and society improve their quality of life meanwhile improving their overall health although it seems difficult right now but is surely possible with combined effort. People who want to travel can easily travel through other means which don't hamper our society.

To conclude, I firmly maintain that environment is above everything primarily because we are the guardians of this planet and it is our utmost responsibilty to protect it and apart from that it is our home so we should keep it clean and make it a better place for our future generations.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You state a clear preference for protecting the environment, especially in the introduction and conclusion, and you explain that reducing flights could lower aircraft pollution and improve health. However, the response only partially addresses the comparison in the question: the disadvantages for individuals and businesses are not meaningfully explained or weighed against the benefits. The claim that people can “easily travel through other means” is asserted without considering practical limits such as distance, time, or business needs. The proposal to impose heavy penalties is also introduced without explaining why this would be fair or effective. To develop the response, discuss specific costs and benefits on both sides, support them with examples, and make the weighing of those effects explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from an introduction to supporting paragraphs and a conclusion, and the central position remains broadly consistent. Some linking expressions, such as “To conclude” and “as a result,” help signal relationships between ideas. However, progression is uneven: the paragraph about penalties shifts from the environmental benefits to enforcement without a clear connection, while the disadvantages named in the question are largely absent. Several sentences are overloaded with multiple points, particularly the long sentence beginning “In this rapidly evolving world,” which makes the argument harder to follow. Organise each body paragraph around one clear point, use shorter sentences where needed, and make references and transitions more precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “environmental benefits,” “air pollution,” “utmost priority,” and “quality of life.” These choices communicate the general subject, but some phrasing is unnatural or imprecise, and spelling errors are noticeable: “environmet,” “enviromental,” and “responsibilty.” Expressions such as “adopted on a massive scale,” “embraced on a rapid extent,” and “creating society a better place” do not sound idiomatic and sometimes obscure your intended meaning. There is also repetition of “environment” and “utmost.” Build accuracy by learning common collocations for climate and transport topics, checking spelling carefully, and choosing direct wording rather than elaborate phrases that do not fit the context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional language in “if this idea is embraced” and a relative clause in “which would be used for the betterment.” However, complex sentences are often difficult to control, and punctuation problems make some ideas run together. For example, the opening sentence lacks a clear grammatical structure, while the sentence beginning “In this rapidly evolving world” joins several clauses without adequate punctuation. There are also errors with articles and agreement, as in “a alternative method,” and the construction “People who want to travel can easily travel through other means” is repetitive and awkwardly formed. Practise building complex sentences around one main clause, then check articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries.

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