Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether.

Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In contemporary society, flying is a matter of considerable debate in nowadays because some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether. From my perspective, the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses because clean environment is the basic necessity for everyone. Moreover, it can also makes our lives more comfortable.

On the one hand, There are numerous positive aspects of this development. Furthermore, It can also reduce a lot of pollution in air and also produced CO2. In addition, it can also very beneficial for climate changes and numerous climate changes can cause to floods. Additionally, it also creates a lot of problems for former's. But stop flying can be really helpful to reduce climates. For instance, A farmer who take care of their crops but their efforts are failed due to bad climates. So this is why stop flying altogether is very good for us.

On the other hand, There are also some drawbacks of this development. Initially, it can creates a lot of problems for individuals and business. Numerous rich people have starts their business in another country and they may also travel by fly. Moreover, this change may makes their lives more difficult. The another reason is related to meets relative from another countries. For instance, A person who lives in Pakistan and their relative lives in japan. Similarly, If flying is stops so he may also feel many hurdles.

In conclusion, this essay discussed the both advantages and limitations of stop flying. It can be greatly beneficial for our environment and this may also creates numerous issues for public. In my opinion, the environmental advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and business because clean environment can makes our lives peaceful.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear overall view: you believe the environmental benefits outweigh the disadvantages, and you mention effects on climate, farmers, businesses, and family visits. This means the response addresses both sides of the question. However, the position and supporting ideas are only partly developed. For example, the claim that flying less reduces pollution is relevant, but the link to climate change and crop failure is asserted rather than explained. The disadvantages are also quite general: the business example does not show specifically how reduced flying would affect a company, while the family example focuses on inconvenience. Develop fewer points with clearer cause-and-effect reasoning and specific examples, and make the comparison between environmental gains and personal or business costs more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for benefits and drawbacks, and a conclusion that restates your view. This helps the reader identify the main sections. However, progression within paragraphs is limited, and linking expressions are often repetitive or mechanical: “Furthermore,” “In addition,” and “Additionally” introduce several points without showing how they relate. Some references are unclear, such as “this change” and “this development,” and the sentence about farmers does not connect smoothly to the preceding claim. Organise each body paragraph around one main idea, then explain and illustrate it in sequence. Use fewer, more precise connectors and ensure each example clearly supports the point before it.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “environmental benefits,” “pollution,” “CO2,” “climate changes,” and “business.” These terms make the general subject understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are inaccurate or unnatural, which reduces precision: “pollution in air,” “beneficial for climate changes,” and “travel by fly” do not express the ideas naturally. Repetition of “a lot,” “numerous,” and “problems” also makes the discussion vague. Choose more precise collocations and vary the language used to describe impacts, such as emissions, climate effects, travel costs, or business operations. Check word forms and spelling as well, including “farmer's,” which is not the intended plural form.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “who,” and “if,” so there is some effort to vary sentence structure. However, control is inconsistent, and errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. Examples include “it can also makes,” “it can creates,” “Numerous rich people have starts,” and “If flying is stops.” These errors sometimes make the intended meaning harder to follow. There are also problems with sentence boundaries and capitalisation, such as capitalising “There” after a comma and beginning examples with “For instance” followed by a fragment-like construction. Practise accurate modal patterns (“can reduce”), subject–verb agreement, and complete conditional sentences before attempting more complex structures.

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